Alignment In The Art Of Jiu Jitsu

Jessica Clifford
Aug 28, 2017 · 5 min read

There is darkness everywhere. Heavy, open-mouthed breathing. Sweat dripping off our bodies and soaking our thick cotton gear. I can hear the rabbit-like thumping in my chest as my heart rhythmically dances across the mats. Arms tucked into my lats as I grind my shoulder into the ground, arching my back and shrimping my hips over to the side. In the flow. In the moment.

We wore blindfolds when we trained here and there. It was the first time I had ever done it before, right in Medellin, Colombia.

Costa Rica, Panama, Colombia, Argentina, Brazil, Hawaii, California, New York, are some of the hot spots I was able to train.

It was becoming apart of my identity. In the early days of university, I could barely think straight. Sitting in class, scribbling down just three things.

  1. The names of countries I imaged visiting.
  2. My signature — just to practice.
  3. “Brazilian Jiu Jitsu” I was obsessed.

I even took a break from my degree just to stay focused for a period of time. My life was mostly bjj.

Eventually I left. I was injured in a drill and rapidly developed fear of re-injury and also had to remove myself from a toxic environment. My moral compass was off. I didn’t feel I was aligned with a “family” that had the same values as I and could not longer participate in that culture.

I wanted to experience that alignment I speak of, for myself. Alignment in the art of jiu jitsu. I have been in search of “more” in my life for over 10 years. Looking for a kind of human experience that allows conscious depths to be unveiled, and in the process of asking so many questions, have absolutely caused myself suffering.

Art is anything and everything. It is all-encompassing. It is everywhere.

I can appreciate certain kinds of dark art exist. I’m not taking temple of set (setian) or dark magic stuff, just straight up, art. The dark art I speak of, is when you look at, speak of, or are in the presence of, you can feel the weight of suffering, fear and pain not only in the artwork itself but I can even imagine the painter, the paintbrush and the agony they must be in to create this piece. It is not a space of joy, nor a beacon of light, nor a voice of hope.

Dark art is there for those who wish to partake.

And while the dark art exists. I move fluidly. I grow myself and recognize that I am in fact over here in my high vibing, joy attracting, colourful feeling, heart-warming, free space. I attract LOVE, GROWTH and LIGHT. I’ve learned not to go near the dark anymore and it’s quite simple as to why. I am drawn to light because I AM light. I want to feel good. Period.

Years. YEARS away from a sport that engulfed my identity. I am now free to be apart of an art that allows me to connect on such a deep level again. I have access to the same thought-provoking lessons I once knew. On a daily basis I am reminded of TWO very important things.

  1. Keep my body safe
  2. Have fun

These are my new fundamentals of life.

I have been forever humbled by the art of jiu jitsu.

Coming back to a sport you once identified with can be extremely difficult. There have been a few factors to help smooth out my transition and so I’d like to share.

  1. One day at a time. literally just one day at a time.
  2. Trust the people around you. Let them in and let them help you by sharing.
  3. Be honest and open about how you feel — not just so people can understand you but so they can help make it easier on you. They WILL reach out, they do notice when you aren’t around and then LOVE to have you in their presence.
  4. NO judgement. Allow for some time to pass. It takes 60 odd days to make a habit so…. work on it. Every-single-day. There isn’t just one way to do things. Work on building those smaller habits.
  5. Clarity. What do you want in your life and why? What are you willing to do in order to make it happen?
  6. Flexibility. So you’ve gotten clear on why you want what you want…well now you have to be flexible to have what you want because you are a different person in this very moment and this situation is different than the last. You have changed and here’s your chance to restart with the knowledge and wisdom you possess. What will you do with it is up to you. Water around rocks.
  7. Get some sleep. Get a massage. Write. Read. Go for a hike. Be in nature. Meditate-TLC it up and give yourself time to heal. Rest is not just for the mind and your muscles but to reset your energetic source. Listen to some great audio books on discipline and will power. Grow to love learning about psychology and understand your brain/body/spirit connection.
  8. EASY NOW EGO. There’s no space or time for you to tag along on this staycation. We get that you were really good at what you DID …before…years ago when you actually put time and energy into whatever it was that you did. BUT HEY! You’re a newbie again, start from the ground up. White belt mode of life. Student = teacher and teacher = student. Be patient and it will come. Give it a little time.
  9. Bye-bye ego, last note for you and for your soul. YOU my dear. Have NOTHING to prove…to ANYONE. Not even yourself.
  10. Enjoy your life. End your own personal suffering by not taking everything so damn seriously.

xx a lover of life

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