Letting Go in the Lionsgate
Today the stars have aligned, literally, creating an opportunity to let go, heal, and release to make space for higher vibrational energies from the Sun and the star Sirius, which is even bigger and brighter than our Sun. These stars are both shining on Earth right now, a rare occurrence referred to as the opening of the Lionsgate Portal.
Today on the opening of the Lionsgate Portal, on this eighth day of the eighth month of 2017, I let go of all of that no longer serves me. I release it all.
This might not mean much to you, the modern American. Let me be clear that you don’t have to believe in astrology or magic to get this. Just know that this is all happening out there in outer space. It’s science. Even NASA is watching planetary and celestial alignment this month in preparation for the total solar eclipse on August 21st.
Today I close on the sale of my first home.

I didn’t choose the date. I couldn’t have chosen it knowingly since I didn’t know what the Lionsgate was until over a month after it was set. After a series of back-and-forths with the buyer, the closing attorneys determined August 8th as the appropriate and feasible date.
I’ve owned this house for over eleven years. It’s physically located in Atlanta, Georgia, my hometown. It was my home for four years, three years of school at Georgia Tech and a fourth saving money to move away. It was the home of fellow students and my friends who rented rooms and later the entire house when I moved. It is the home of new friends now. The married couple that rents it now is buying it for their family.
This property served me practically and emotionally and taught me more than school ever could. In that house I created a space to dance, celebrate, and procrastinate on school assignments. I celebrated my 18th birthday there with friends, loud music, drinks, and one or two mistakes.
Later I threw a crawfish boil there to celebrate my graduation from Georgia Tech with tons of friends and family, cold draft beer, sweet mudbugs, and an unforgettable speech from my height-challenged Mother on top of a dining table chair. Those walls saw some things (ahem, a lot of things). I’m not alone when I say it’s a good thing those walls can’t speak.
I learned that people will surprise you no matter how well you thought you knew them.
One guy rented a room from me for a year, then he left school for awhile and came back the next year. He had a good track record for paying on time and keeping to himself so I rented to him again for my last year at Georgia Tech. He didn’t show up to my graduation party at the house so I called him thinking something could be wrong. He never returned my calls or messages and he never came back to the house for any of his stuff. I still haven’t heard from him.
“There is only one way to learn,” the alchemist answered. “It’s through action.”
Paulo Coehlo
In the process of home ownership I learned what escrow is, how and when to pay taxes, all types of taxes, and when to appeal them. I learned how to be a solid landlady and how not to be.
I learned that the joyous work of home ownership is never finished, no matter how fast you work. Even more so, when you focus on the finish line, the work becomes daunting and painful. And when you focus on the task at hand, you can enjoy it, being present and giving back to the home that shelters you and your belongings.
I see now that the finish line is just an illusion. You’re not done until you take your last breath or sign on the dotted line passing on the property to the next owner.
I learned that things can happen that no one expected. And that I can survive them.
I bought my home in the summer of 2006, one month after my high school graduation. If you’ve seen the movie The Big Short then you know where this is going. I really shouldn’t have been able to buy at house with a hostess job at that age, despite the fact that it was totally legal. I had the down payment in cash.
When I was five, a poodle bit me in the face.
It was bloody. My strong love for dogs was tested when I was around the breed for many years after. Plastic surgery was done quickly and only a few small scars remain on my cheek that you probably never noticed. The dog had bit other people and my babysitting neighbor probably shouldn’t have left us alone together in the next room. All I remember was playing copycat with the little white poodle and then, chomp!
Through legal action I was awarded a sum that my Father invested in CDs until I could legally have the money. When I came of age, I chose between using the cash to attend UCLA, taking on massive student loans to cover the remaining costs, or taking on the debt of a mortgage and staying in-state for school using HOPE scholarship, a merit-based scholarship funded by the state lotto to keep bright students in Georgia. So I chose the highest-ranked school in the state, in the urban center of Atlanta, and lived in a 3 bedroom 2 bathroom house instead of dorms.
One of my first jobs in high school was working in my Mother’s real estate brokerage. She taught me the ins-and-outs of the business and provided the knowledge and access I needed to find the right property near school within my budget.
What we didn’t know was that we were smack in the middle of the biggest housing bubble in history and it was all about to come crashing down.
By 2008 foreclosures were at an all time high and housing prices had dropped to all time lows. My Mother’s small brokerage was forced to close it doors and she moved to Austin, Texas soon after.
Around the same time, I owed more on the house than it was now worth. With guidance from my parents, I decided to refinance my mortgage to lower my monthly payment and take advantage of falling interest rates. The costs of refinancing were then rolled into my monthly payment, another learning experience.
In 2010 I followed my Mother’s footsteps and moved to Austin with a brave Ukrainian man who was also ready for a fresh start. Instead of renting out bedrooms, I rented the entire house for the seven years following.
My Father, still living in Atlanta, helped with the practical things: meeting tenants to deliver keys, buffing floors, negotiating costs for a new roof, showing up when needed. I collected rent and made mortgage payments, grew credit history, and learned more about tax deductions than I ever wanted to know.
Sometimes you take risks that payoff and sometimes you take risks that don’t. Sometimes the payoff takes longer than you planned.
Still, being clear on what you really want is the first step. I want to release this home. I see that it is no longer serving me how it had before. And I see that the market is in a position where if I let it go, it won’t hurt me financially. I see how much I learned from the experience and I’m grateful for what I know now.
Not everyone agreed with me. Some of my loved ones didn’t think I should have bought the house in the first place. Some didn’t feel that I needed to let it go, or at least not right now. Maybe if I waited I could get a better deal. Maybe if I sold it now I’d have to go back just to do all the repairs it would need to be put on the market and maybe I’m not able to put that amount of energy into it with everything else happening in the world around me. Maybe, maybe not.
The truth is that I am the only one who knows what I need and what is or is not serving me. The truth is that I’ve had to quiet my mind and the noise that surrounds me to listen to the voice inside that points forward into the direction that suits me best.
No one can tell you the best thing for you. Not your partner. Not your parents. Not your therapist. No one.
We all have inner-guidance and it’s the truest guidance available to us. It shows itself in different ways at different times but it’s always there in one way or another. Sometimes we listen and sometimes we don’t. When we do though, the results are bigger, better, and more bad ass than we had hoped.
If you don’t like the end of the story, keep writing.
