I’m sorry you had an issue with a manager assuming you were gay though I’m glad you resolved it in a beneficial manner. However, you shouldn’t assume that the transactional nature of your experience is the same as everyone else’s. Perhaps some context to my story would help — that was literally a joke made when looking at the resume of a highly qualified ivy-league graduate woman. The stereotype of women going to have babies was preventing a call back and potentially *costing someone a job*.
Now this is a particularly egregious example but imagine working with someone who makes this assumption about the qualifications of half the population. It’s not always that blatant but it does mean you get different responsibilities or maybe you’re just not invited to the right meetings. This isn’t an issue of buckle down and show them your worth it’s about how freaking exhausting it is to have to fight to even start with *an even playing field*
I’m not claiming I have it the worst of anyone in the world (I’ve overall really enjoyed almost all the people I’ve worked with!) but I do think it bares acknowledging that when you start people in a world that, as you mention, underpays and overworks, and then add on the burden of having to prove you even deserve to be there it gets pretty damn exhausting.
Fighting for equality is the idea that it doesn’t matter if you’re a woman, or gay, or another underrepresented minority. As long as you show up and put in the same work, it shouldn’t matter.