If Bitcoin and Shitcoins were Rappers 🎧

A short comprehensive guide to crypto currencies for hip-hop heads

It’s been a long goal of mine to get as many of my homies into the crypto trading space A$AP. The biggest obstacle was that I could never draw any comparisons in this relatively new space to help spark interest to teach my friends the characteristics/relationships between the many crypto currencies available.

As the price kept trending up - the need to guide had been growing. Finally, after reading a group text dissecting Lil Wayne’s new Dedication 6 mixtape, it hit me! Rappers, with their numerous differences in appearance and deliveries, mirror perfectly the different appearances and functions of crypto currencies … and Lil Wayne is still the best rapper alive!

WARNING: Feelings are going to get hurt after reading this. That’s half the reason for why I am putting this shit together. First half for education, second half is to stir the pot and evoke emotions. Everyone has some stake in every coin/rapper and will not agree with what I have to say. GOOD! Who the fuck am I anyways? Please challenge me; start a discussion that helps those who are on the outside looking in learn more.

For now, we are only going to compare whats listed on GDAX (Coinbase). If there is later interest in revisiting this and making a series of comparisons on smaller exchanges, I would be happy to start getting that together. Maybe we can compare exchanges to regions like West Coast, East Coast and the Dirty South. For now, we are going to keep it simple: Bitcoin, Litecoin, Ethereum and BCash.

Bitcoin = Jay Z

Jay Z, the Bitcoin of rap.

There is no fighting that Jay Z and Bitcoin both are Jedi like force that shows no signs of slowing down. The pair are considered originators in their space. After every dip or lull it seems like the two come back even stronger than ever. Hova and Bitcoin are THE standards that everyone replicates in each’s respective industry. We have seen numerous forks of both, but there can only be one. Lately anything involving Bitcoin and Jay Z generates a buzz and can do no wrong. The list of comparisons are too long, and the topic very well deserves its own article. To save time, I will leave this comparison at this — Next time you hear Bitcoin, just think of Jay Z: Highly distributed, Universal, Immutable and Big Pimpin’.

Litecoin = Kanye

Litecoin of Rap

Repeat after me… Jay Z is to Bitcoin as Kanye is to Litecoin. The similarities between Ye and LTC are far stronger than Jay’s and BTC. Litecoin has been popularly referred to as the silver to Bitcoin’s gold. Please tell me who better than Yeezy to be Jay Z’s silver? In Kanye’s third album, Graduation, the song Big Brother says…

I told Jay I did a song with cold play
Next thing I know he got a song with coldplay
Back in my mind I’m like damn, no way
Translate espanol
No way Jose

This line compares to one of LTC’s core functions: acting as the the test network for for Bitcoin. LTC implemented Lightning and Segwit waaaay before BTC, and Kanye started working on Homecoming waaaay before Jay Z’s Beach Chair. Next time you hear Litecoin, just think of Kanye: Harder Better Faster Stronger… Block Processing Times.

Ethereum = Migos

Migos — Like Ethereum operational with Gas

Lots of hype and featured everywhere. Apply that description to either Ethereum or Migos and you’d be right. Seriously there is no cap on either of these guys. If you are new to the crypto game and decide to try your hand in ICOs, be prepared to deal with Ethereum. The same applies to new artists in the music game, be prepared to deal with the Migos. Both have tons of fanboys you wanna punch in the face… Especially when they say they are better than BTC/Jay Z. You can call Migos/Ethereum boring at times and repetitive, but every now and then you are gonna get a raindrops drop tops/cryptokitty triple platinum idea causing a surge in popularity to new ATHs (All Time Highs). Next time you hear Ethereum, just think of Migos: IF Migos were signed to G.O.O.D. music, THEN it would be a… smart contract.

BCash = Lil Pump

Don’t give the time of day and hopefully it will go away. Next time you hear BCash, just think of Lil Pump: Lil Pump = Lil Dump = BCash.

Lil Dump

Hopefully this was a little helpful with getting your feet wet about characteristics and relationships between crypto currencies. I made sure to leave as many links as I could to as many resources possible through out the article to help jump start further learning.

Follow on Twitter: @jetjaguar3030

Let me know what YOU think! Which rappers would compare to other shitcoins? Let a bro know by sharing comments below or hitting me up on Twitter: Jet Jaguar!

Charting from the bottom, now we here… 👨🏾‍💻