
Cure for Loneliness
At eleven months old I was adopted from China into a white African and American home. Usually a family covers maybe a state or two, or three. Nope, not my family. We cover three continents and three countries. Being adopted from China, raised in a pastor’s home, and having a Dad from Zimbabwe and Mom from the States is not normal. My name is Jaimee He Lan McGuinness and this is my unique family background.
As a senior in college I am taking a class called Christian Perspectives on Sin and Culture. Part of the class is reading a book by Paul David Tripp called Sex and Money. In the first couple chapters for this week’s reading, Tripp explains in his second chapter “The Dangerous Dichotomy” a concept that impacted my life: “A gospel-centered approach to sex and money that avoids the insanity of the surrounding culture must begin with looking at life through the window of the doctrine of creation. The four words that kick off the biblical story of creation, ‘In the beginning God,’…” (Tripp 28). In today’s culture the approach to sex and money is egocentrism. What can I get out of sex and money that benefits me? Usually no one thinks once about what God has to say about sex and money. Sex and money is just for my pleasure.
Side Effects Chainsmokers (https://www.youtube.comwatch?v=nuckTcoZG4Q)
Remedy Alesso
(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vB67ddBhO1c)
With egocentrism being the center of sex, two songs that can out recently called Side Effects by Chainsmokers and Remedy by Alesso focus on what I can get out of sex when I am lonely. Key lines such as: “Come on give me love tonight/ooh, I think you all the time/Make it happen in my mind…” (Side Effects) and “That loneliness is my decease/ I believe…/ that you are my remedy” (Remedy). Despite the repetition of lyrics throughout the song and catchy, upbeat tunes, these two lines are the epitome of what the songs are about. The cure to loneliness in the songs is to satisfy physical pleasures withsex. These songs are appealing and popular in today’s culture because many people feel lonely. Sadly, the message today is to just have sex.
Our culture screams sex as a pleasure for the self in music, movies, what we read, etc. Our culture goes against everything that Tripp said about God being at the center of what sex is. As I have observed other relationships throughout high school and college I have been aware of how some relationships are very self-focused. Coming from a conservative pastor’s home, I was encouraged to date with the intent of marriage. Not to use dating or sex as a remedy or to contribute to making me feel good. It makes me sad to see how relationships can be so self-focused and my prayer is that my dating relationship and marriage may reflect a God centered and other’s focused perspective.
Here is a helpful resource of understanding loneliness and how to help: