No, you don’t have to Meditate to be Happier or More Successful.
The meditation hype is causing its own kind of anxiety
I get it: every successful person meditates. People who don’t meditate are just hamsters on a wheel, living a life of reactionary, mindless chaos. People who don’t meditate can’t enjoy living in the moment, hell, they can’t even enjoy food or vacations because they’re already thinking about what they’re going to do next.
“When (Tim) Ferriss sat down with more than 200 executives, leaders, and other people at the heights of their fields for his new book, Tools of Titans, he found that 80% had “some form of guided mindfulness practice.
About two years ago I finally caved and gave meditation a go. Like many people I started with Headspace, a beautifully simple guided meditation app narrated by Andy Puddicombe, a man with the most reassuring voice i’ve ever heard. I managed to use the app for 3 months straight, meditating almost every day. The crazy thing is it actually worked. I found myself feeling more calm, less reactionary and overall happier. Here’s the thing though: after the first 3 months I started missing a day here, a day there and eventually completely fell off the bandwagon.
Two years later, i’m still a subscriber to Headspace but I very rarely use it. Why don’t I unsubscribe? Why am I still spending over $70 per year? Because I have Meditation Anxiety, that’s why!
Meditation Anxiety
It seems like every productivity/business/entrepreneurship book, podcast, conference or TED talk I look at today has the same solution to being a more successful, happier, saner person, it’s easy really: Just meditate for 20 minutes once or twice per day.
It’s not that I don’t believe in the power of mindfulness, it’s simply that meditation as a practice doesn’t fit with where I currently am in my life! I’m too excited, too optimistic and enthusiastic to sit still… maybe even too young.
Over the last few months I’ve come to terms that meditation is just not for me right now but I still need ways to make sure i’m not always in a reactionary mode.
Have “No Podcast” moments while commuting, cooking, cleaning or going to the gym
I’m a podcast freak, I’m subscribed to about 50 podcasts and never run out of content to consume. I rarely have a gym session or work commute without a podcast blasting information into my head. I love it. Here’s the problem though: podcasts also act as a great “thought numbing” device. The noise stopping you from being in the moment, from really focussing on what you’re actually doing.
I’m not saying to quit listening to podcasts, but to try to consciously decide on having ‘no podcast’ moments while cooking, for example. You’ll find that letting your mind wander while focussing on a repetitive task really isn’t such a bad thing.
Go to the movies alone
Going to the movies alone, no matter how crappy or average the movie actually is, puts my mind into an interesting, almost meditative state. The first thing I noticed (and i’ll mention this later again) is that going to the movies alone puts you in this weird 3–4 hour zone where you simply don’t talk. Of course, when you’re at home, not talking is entirely normal, but being somewhere with a potentially large group of people focussing on the same thing but not talking is a very foreign feeling.
People, especially those who need constant distraction watch less and less movies. Instead they spend the same amount of time or more watching easy-to-digest, low commitment content like TV Shows or Youtube videos. Even when they do watch movies they’re distracted by their phones or laptops. Being able to really focus on a movie and nothing else is the key here.
Go to the sauna
Now, the ease of access to a good sauna really depends on where you live of course. I live in Berlin, Germany where great saunas are on every street corner. The feeling of blood pumping through my system after taking an ice cold plunge or shower following an intense sweat session is the closest I’ve come to the feeling you get after a long, successful meditation session. My mind is focussed only on the physical sensations, thoughts essentially disappear for a few minutes and then come rushing back with an amazing intensity. I genuinely believe that my best ideas came from sauna sessions.
Take a weekend break, away from home, alone
One of the most productive and ‘mindfull’ weekends of my life was a 2-day lone visit to Amsterdam. I hadn’t planned on being there, but I decided to extend my trip after a running a workshop during the week and realising that I really wanted to explore more of the city.
I spent 2 days just walking around, buying books, reading and walking some more. I didn’t visit anyone, didn’t make plans, just walked around alone. I’m not saying this is anything comparable to meditation, but if you, like me, are rarely alone, the whole experience of essentially not talking for 2 days is something extremely calming for the mind, even if it’s very strange at first.
I would suggest, if you’re going to try something like this, not to listen to podcasts or music as you walk around. Just focus on taking in the scenery, observing the people and really being where you are. In general, i’m starting to get the feeling that podcasts, even though I love them, are secretly killing our ability to be comfortable with quiet moments with no input.
Play a Videogame
Sure, video games are a waste of time, but what about those 3 hours you spend on social media and browsing BS on the internet? Playing a good Videogame can be the ultimate way to get into an intensely focussed, meditative state. (Even if that focus is extrinsic rather than something like your breath.) Playing something with an engaging story or game mechanic can be extremely absorbing.
For those who don’t play games, there are plenty of low-barrier to entry games that anyone can get going with, play for 40 mins, then get on with what they were doing. Like a cold shower or a sauna, it’s a guaranteed mind-state change.
Game recommendations:
- Journey (Beautiful, meditative, emotional, simple to play)
- Inside (Dark, disturbing, intelligent puzzles)
- Mario Kart 8 (A quick burst of challenging fun )
Try the cold shower thing
This one’s pretty simple but takes some courage. At the end of every shower, turn the water to the coldest setting and stand underneath for about 20 seconds. Much like the sauna, you’re mind will focus 100% on physical sensations and your brain feels like it hits the reset button. The cold shower is an excellent way to reset your mind after a long, stressful workday… or a terrible hangover. It’s an almost guaranteed mind-state change.
Draw or Paint
Get a piece of paper, a few pens, and start drawing. Don’t know what to draw? Find something you’d like to copy and start trying to draw that. I do recommend listening to some music while drawing (A band called Dreyma are a nice pick). Drawing puts me in a hyper-focussed state, my mind is thinking of nothing but how to draw what’s on the page. It doesn’t matter if you suck, or have never sketched something before, just give this one a try and see how you feel after 30 minutes.
Write
Writing, even writing this article is a complete mind-calmer for me. Writing fiction, however, has an even greater effect. I write a lot of crappy short stories (which I never publish) just because I enjoy the process. My advice is to set a timer, get some paper and just start writing. It usually takes me about 10 minutes to even find a topic I want to write about and that’s not a problem. This exercise is not about creating anything good, it’s just about creating.
Play Music
I never feel more at-ease and non-reactive than when I sit down to play guitar or piano. If you can play an instrument, this is an amazing way to put your mind into a transe-like state. Don’t know what to play? Find the chords or notes to a song you like, learn it and play it over and over. I really don’t do this enough but I always feel amazing after playing the same Radiohead song over and over for an hour.
Jog or Walk (No Podcast, No Music)
Go for a long jog or a long walk with no input. I’m not going to go ahead an explain this one because it’s pretty much the same principles as explained before.
Don’t feel bad if you don’t meditate
The first thing you need to know about Meditation-Anxiety is that it exists. Most entrepreneurs I know wish they could meditate more, many beat themselves up about it.
Here’s the thing, maybe you’ll get into meditation 10 years from now, or maybe it’ll never be your thing. What’s important is that you really shouldn’t be feeling stressed about the thing that’s supposed to reduce your anxiety, help you live in the moment and make you happier. There are other ways to be mindful, reduce anxiety and pull yourself out of a reactive state. I’ve given you my “hacks”, i’d love to hear yours!
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