How to Work Under a Micro-manager and not go Crazy
A Lesson Learned but not soon enough
I stormed out of the office a few weeks ago cell phone in hand while anxiously digging in my purse for my keys. It was a bad work day that consisted of at least fifteen emails from my boss all of which I received in a two hour period (keep in mind my shift is 8 hours).
One email stated, “ did you do the work I told you to do a minute ago? Do it now so I can control you” this isn’t word for word but this is how I perceived it at the time. Then there are the emails to unnecessarily fill my inbox; “Look, did you make that follow up call?” Or “Hey your time In the restroom was fairly long today” and my favorite, “You realized you snapped at me in your reply message”.
I can’t win
Once I made a small fixable mistake on a Friday morning before the boss arrived. Within 20 minutes I fixed my error, sent out emails and received my “thank you for handling this, you are the best!” responses. When the boss came in all was good, until I got a call. “You know you made a mistake right? Why did you do it? Do you even care you made it?, lets have a meeting”
Lets have a write up
At that moment the peace I had about noticing a mistake and being proactive to fix it went out the window. I was sucked in to the bosses wrath of disappointment, unhappiness, and the cruel and un-cruel intentions of a person who can’t see good in my work, only bad.
This was not my first experience with a micro-manager, I left my dream job last year because I realized that my spirit was dying a little every day. I see micro-managers as control freaks who need to know what is going on 24–7 and I get it, yet I also see the downside, these people are unhappy beings who can’t let go and it costs their departments money and the loss of employee morale. Its a vicious cycle that higher ups don’t take too serious because they think you are complaining.
I’ve also noticed micro-managers have a strange way of making sure their work is effective. So truly in this type of work environment if it has nothing to do with theft or sexual harassment you can be emotionally harassed in the workplace.
But hopefully not
My breaking point was when I started to mentally and emotionally break down at home in the evenings, and then on weekends, and eventually my moral decreased to the point where I didn't care if I had a job and couldn't pay the mortgage next month. It was bad. I couldn't eat, all of a sudden I suffered from IBS, and family members were seriously worried about me.
I started to Google search how to deal with micro-managers, and I tried. I put on fake happy faces, I presented information to them before they asked for it. I kept my area clean and it still didn't help. The only thing I noticed was when they were having a bad day, you would have a bad day. When they didn't want to do the work they’d throw it on me and if I made a mistake (write up) so I left my dream job with the great quarterly bonuses and salary. Luckily for me I had a job offer in the same week.
Through experience I have learned how to deal with this type of management. Micro-managing is every where and the grass isn’t always greener on the other side, it is best to learn how to deal with the problem until you can find something else, transfer departments, go back to school, hope he/she retires. Below is what generally helps me daily.
- Out of all emails you get respond to management emails first, and respond thoroughly. In complete sentences like we learned in school.
- Be honest, if you make a mistake own it.
- Don’t fall into the hole, do not worry with them, or over analyze with them stay positive, stay in character.
- When your manager starts with the random negative emails, send one email showing what positive or good things you have done that week or month.
- Keep the solution-based mindset.
- Take your breaks, regardless of what your co workers do. Take your vacation and sick days.
- Human resources is a last resort, for example if said manager starts timing your restroom breaks! Or if you really truly feel you are being harassed.
I’ve made these minor changes, despite my personal resistance, there really is no winning when it comes to being micromanaged but you can make your days a personal win as opposed to going home defeated.
