Partnering with God Against Heartache
If I were to solely express the feelings and happenings in my life, this medium would be nothing more than a glorified diary. To truly have my work glorify God, I pray that He help me be intentional with my words. Without Him, I am but a vapor in the wind.
As promised, here’s a dose of honesty and vulnerability. This month has been amongst the worst in my life. Never have I felt so torn between friendship, family, and relationship. Altogether, these pains have pushed me towards the extreme ends of my emotional spectrum: apathetic numbness and silent weeping. However, going into details will not provide the catharsis I need — that alone comes from the Lord. Now, I have two choices: I can either wallow in my anguish, or I can fight desperately to soften my heart for Christ.
Did Christ not suffer oh so infinitely more? Is everything He does not for the good of me? Was I not called to pick up the cross and follow after Him?
The more individualized my view is of the world and the less I see my spiritual walk as a partnership with Christ, the more prone to failure I am and the less closer I draw near to Him.
I am encouraged by Charles Spurgeon. “I am certain that I never did grow in grace one-half so much anywhere as I have upon the bed of pain.”
The question of whats and hows still eludes me, but I know this. The sorrow of the world, the joy of the Lord; the latter infinitely outweighing the former. I must have hope in the Lord. I am going to fight all the harder to ground myself in Him. He is worth it.
“The Lord is near to the brokenhearted
and saves the crushed in spirit.”