The Russians are Here! The Russians are Here!

Can we please just agree to sack The Speaker of the House and replace him with a Republican and a patriot? The headline from yesterday’s hearings was clear — Russian Spies infiltrated our national election in ways that are so severe and secret that we should be rattled to our core about what happened. It was, as some have suggested, an act of war.

And yet The Speaker of the House took away a different headline. He seemed to believe the news coming from Capitol Hill yesterday was that President Trump — AKA Captain Chaos — was vindicated and had every right to be frustrated with rumors that he (Trump) had been under investigation for connection to Russian spies. The same President Trump who apparently volunteered for no apparent reason, “the rumors about me and the Russian prostitutes isn’t true.” Er, What?!

Of note, our Dear President went on to defend himself against allegations of swinging with prostitutes in Russia by saying that he assumed all his actions in Russia were recorded, so of course he wouldn’t dally with prostitutes while there. What the hell do recordings have to do with anything? Silly me, I prefer presidents who don’t dally with prostitutes whether they’re being recorded or not.

But wait, the story is not — I repeat NOT — about President Trump. No matter how much the President and his minions try to make it about him. The story is about Russian spies interfering with our elections and, apparently, obtaining information with which to blackmail some (many?) of our senior government officials.

The only story Captain Chaos should be touting right now is his personal determination to get to the very bottom of this unprecedented threat to our democracy. Why does our President apparently not care about this? And why doesn’t anyone seem to notice that he doesn’t care? Ronald Reagan didn’t win the Cold War so that some former head of the KGB and future Russian dictator could blackmail senior American officials while Russian spies infiltrated a United States Presidential election.

All this while Captain Chaos plays golf, says ignorant things about foreign countries, consistently changes his mind on major policy points based on whatever the last thing he heard happened to be, and potentially obstructs justice. All of the President’s trespasses are forgiven not by actual Republicans, but by weak willed, cowardly politicians — led by The Speaker of the House Paul Ryan — who declared yesterday that all the President’s missteps, even illegal ones, are okay because the President is new at government and doesn’t know how things work.

Not a legally successful argument, by the way. Ignorance of the law is never an excuse for breaking the law. But that’s who we elected to hold the nuclear codes and be in command of the Situation Room in a national emergency — a rube who doesn’t know how things work and so should be excused all of his trespasses.

By the by, here’s what the Speaker of the House just announced to all of our enemies: Our President doesn’t know how to do his job yet, so feel free to infiltrate, attack and generally wreak havoc. Our President has training wheels and he still crashes — so you stand a great chance of getting the better of him. Go for it!

Meanwhile, the President’s son went on national television and declared that the hatred aimed at his father is unprecedented (it’s not) and that the folks who hate his father (liberals) are not people. Not people? That was the underpinning of the Holocaust, by the way. People in power declaring Jews, Gypsies and others as non-people. Here’s a clue: The folks concerned about Captain Chaos and his band of misfit cronies are not only people, they’re American citizens, taxpayers and voters.

Where are the Republicans when we need them most? Rise up, ye children of Ronald Reagan, George Bush (both of them), Richard Nixon and all the rest, rise up we say, ignore the chatter about Captain Chaos and lead the charge in slaying the Communist monster as it rises from the dead and attempts to destroy us from within. Remember the real story: Russian spies have infiltrated our government and our national elections.

Now, what are you going to do about it?