Not Giving A Fuck

When you put yourself out there people will criticize you. People will be harsh calling you names and discrediting you every chance they get. At first it really bothered me. But over time I realized two things.

The first realization was when I started to ask myself why someone’s opinion of me bothered me? The more I thought about it, the more I realized it was an insecurity I had.

It’s inevitable that if your work is to push boundaries it will by it’s very nature get noticed by people who disagree with your views. So if you’re getting criticized it’s usually a sign that you are saying something important.

Like Winston S. Churchill once said:

“You have enemies? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.”

School and society wants everyone to be perfect and has discouraged all pushing of boundaries since we were children so it’s normal to feel critical about yourself. But self-critism is like a disease of the mind. It’s an obsessive voice that buzzes around like a mosquito distracting you from realizing your full potential.

I’ve never learned anything from a perfect person.

Just be yourself and get comfortable with it. If you’re not PG 13 type of person in real life, stop pretending your PG 13 online.

The second thing I realized was that what people think about you has nothing to do with you and everything to do with them.

Maybe what you are saying discredits them, maybe it makes them feel guilt or shame. Whatever it is, being insulted by words comes from something deeper than simply a difference in opinion.

The same way I asked myself the question of why other people’s opinions of me bother me. Most people don’t stop to question their feelings too often.

The rule I’ve found to help me when trying to judge what I should publish is that if it feels right in my heart — then i’ll do it.

Like all fears, the only way to conquer your fear of being fully yourself is to face it. To put the real you out there in all your perfect imperfections.

So be yourself and don’t waste another second of your life giving a fuck about what others think of you.


Originally published at Jean-Luc Boissonneault.

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