How you can acquire Habits that trigger your Happy Hormones
What if I told you, that all you need to be happy are the right kinds of habits? Well, it is not that simple but there’s definitely a lot to be gained from the underlying idea. Here’s how our happy chemicals are triggered and what healthy habits you can approach to increase their release and experience more joyful moments.
How do our happy chemicals work?
From an evolutionary perspective our purpose is to make sure that we meet our needs for survival. This includes food, safety and social support, among others. To achieve this, the brain releases chemicals that create an urge and a natural prioritisation for actions: when you’re starving, the feeling of hunger is more important than to keep on cuddling with your partner.
Serotonin, dopamine, oxytocin and endorphins are hormones that create a positive feeling when released. This happy state only lasts for a short period of time because it is not helpful for survival if you’re constantly on a high and don’t see the lion that approaches you. Evolution did not optimise us for happiness, but rather for survival. Happy feelings are only the pathway to achieve this goal.
I do not consider adrenaline a ‘happy chemical’ in this context, as it is released when something important happens (either good or bad) that is vital for surviving and requires our energy.
In contrast to less complex brains, such as the one of a lizard for example, our human brains are not hard-wired but can learn from experiences and we can adapt our behaviour. Therefore, if your aim is to make the most out of life and be happy, it’s definitely worth to think about habits that create positive emotions. A very good introduction to the science of happiness was written by Marcel Jünemann in this post.
The question remains what makes the specific chemical release and how to habit-trigger them on a regular basis. Of course, our life is already heavily shaped by their release. To name just a few examples:
- we love to scroll through our Instagram feed (dopamine),
- we buy expensive watches, smartphones, cars etc. to impress our peers (serotonin), and
- different groups in our society are separating more and more from each other, often connected to a ‘we against them’ thought pattern (oxytocin).
These are some of the disadvantageous and unhealthy patterns our chemicals make us adopt. But we have a choice: we can change our habits. There are plenty of articles on Medium on how to get rid of old and implement new habits into your everyday life. But for now, let’s have a look at our happy chemicals and some healthy habit patterns that we can replace unhealthy habits with.
Dopamine
When we find things that meet our needs, their achievement releases dopamine and creates a feeling of joy. Motivated by the perspective of pleasure, it even makes us approach large need-fulfilling challenges that require a lot of effort.
This could be to find some nutritious berries, a successful hunt, or a safe place to sleep at night. A modern world equivalent could be the completion of a task at work, a chore, or a thesis for your study.
How to build dopamine habits
Celebrate small victories
Say “I did it!” to yourself when you’ve achieved a success. It might seem hard and maybe even weird at first, but trust me: if you look for it, you’ll find something to celebrate yourself for. It is about adjusting your expectations so you can be pleased with the things you actually do. It could be something like doing the dishes, going out for a run, or writing an email to a colleague. In the end, celebrating many small victories releases more dopamine than one big achievement — so why not feel happy along the way?
Take small steps towards a bigger goal
Take 10 minutes everyday to work on something that works towards a larger goal. This way, you can build a momentum and you’ll notice that it doesn’t need much time or money to actually make progress towards a goal.
Don’t forget to mentally come back to the present, though. You do not want to live in the future constantly (I’ve been there, it’s not healthy).
Another way to make use of this is that you can divide an unpleasant task into many small tasks and tackle one of those every day.
Keep adjusting the bar
We do like challenges that are ‘just about right’. They should not be too easy, nor too hard. Think about a basketball hoop — if it’s too low, there’s no pleasure in scoring. And if it’s too high, you don’t have any motivation to try at all. It’s the sweet spot that creates the challenge we love. So try to lower the bar where you’ve set impossible goals for yourself and raise the difficulty where you’ve set it too low to feel a reward. You could try this for you cooking standards or your exercise goals, for example.
Oxytocin
Our ancestors benefited greatly from the power of groups. This is why humans with stronger social connections had a higher chance of surviving and oxytocin supports this aspect: it makes us feel safe in companionship and motivates us to trust others.
It gets released when we are close to somebody, be that physically, emotionally, intellectually, or in another way. Therefore, it also plays an important role in romantic relationships.
How to build oxytocin habits
Be trustworthy
One trigger for oxytocin is trust, but it does not have to be you trusting another person. It works vice versa as well: you feel good when someone trusts you. By creating opportunities for others to trust you, you can enjoy more oxytocin. Be careful with this one, though, as you don’t want to become the person who neglects oneself in order to help others. Simply try to stick to your commitments. This could be to speak up, if you don’t agree with something.
Get a massage
Pleasant physical contact releases oxytocin as well. So go and get a massage! You don’t have to spend a lot of money as you can
- team up with a massage buddy for mutual exchange,
- get better at it while visiting a massage class, or
- try self-massaging, for example using the Qigong method, which is easy to learn with a video.
Interact with people
Groups make us feel closeness as well, so seek social interactions with people who are close to you. Organise a game night with friends, meet for a long walk with someone you like, or visit your family. If this should be impossible due to pandemic or distance reasons, think about virtual alternatives. This does not feel as close, but in the end it comes down to the quality rather than the quantity of the social interaction (there’s a very good TED talk on this topic). To make this one a habit, set yourself a goal, for example one social activity per week.
Serotonin
A high status in a group or in a society did increase your chance of survival and reproduction in the past. This is where serotonin comes into play: it triggers a positive emotion when you feel respected by others. Therefore, it also motivates you to get respect.
You might think that status is not important to you, but our old brain circuits are still with us and our brain acts like our life depends on the attention of others (because in the past, it was).
In an experiment, chimpanzees were willing to trade food ‘just’ to see a photo of the alpha chimp in their group and seemingly get its attention (which also triggers serotonin).
Another example can be found in hotels and restaurants: the service staff will be friendly to you as it creates a feeling of respect and you feel better.
How to build serotonin habits
Express pride on what you’ve done
Pride is a complicated thing as it can easily be perceived as being arrogant. But for us, something feels wrong when we’re not recognised by others. So try to say ‘Look what I did!’ on a regular basis to someone else. You might be disappointed if you don’t get the respect you were hoping for-but that shouldn’t keep you from trying it again the next day.
Notice your influence
The longing for social significance and for having an impact on our environment is wired deep down in our brains. Some people achieve this in unhealthy ways, such as hurting others to feel their impact on the world. A better way would be to value the impact you already have on others. This is not easy in the beginning, but in this very moment there’s a good chance people are already respecting you. This does not mean to verbalise it and tell others ‘I told you so’. Rather, try to notice your subtle influence on others and feel satisfied.
There is an interesting phenomenon when raising children: parents often feel like they don’t have an influence on their offspring. But if they knew how big their impact actually was, they would pay more attention to the example they set.
Make peace with something you don’t control
Our brains love the feeling of being in control. Ironically, the only thing we are actually in charge of is happening inside our own head: our thoughts, expectations and reaction to things happening outside of us. Once we’ve accepted this, we know what we can change and what we’re in charge of. You can get their by self reflecting and reminding yourself of it repeatedly. Alternatively, you can surround yourself with conditions in which you don’t feel ‘on top of things’. So if you’re someone who tries to cook the perfect meal, do not cook with recipes. Vice versa, if you are more of a freestyle chef, try to follow a recipe step-by-step.
Stoicism follows this exact idea of knowing what we’re in control of. A great book in this regard is The Daily Stoic by Ryan Holiday.
Endorphin
When you’re running from a lion and get injured while doing so, the best thing to do is to keep running. Endorphin helps you to escape from harm, as it prevents the sensation of pain and creates an euphoric feeling when you’re hurt.
A ‘runner’s high’ is a common phenomenon in this context. We get close to our limit (i.e. injured) and endorphins are released.
How to build endorphin habits
Laugh
No, really — it works! Laughing triggers endorphins as your innards convulse. It is a release of fear. So find out what makes you laugh and make time for it. To sneer at others won’t work, though — it has to be a real ha-ha laugh. Only laughing on the outside might be helpful to bring you into a mood in which you can laugh more easily, but in the end you want to laugh from your inside as well and truly feel it to release endorphins.
Vary your exercises
As endorphins get released when we experience strain, exercises are a great way to trigger releases. As you do not want to stress one part of your body all the time, do something that you have not done before. If you’re already athletic you might feel clumsy but this is a sign you’re working on your weak spots, which is great! If you never exercise, everything you do will be new to you so you just have to start doing it.
Regular stretching
Stretching actually releases endorphins as well. The great thing is that it is healthy and easy to integrate into your everyday-life. You can do it while waiting in line, talking to a friend on the phone, or during a small break while working.
For the successful integration of one of these habits I would suggest to take on one habit at a time and stick to it for a reasonable period of time, let’s say 45 to 90 successive days. Note that you’re probably leaving your comfort zone here and that it won’t feel really good the first time. Your brain has to get used to it and that takes time. Once you’ve adopted the habit, the pathways in your brain have been build and happy chemicals flow more easily.
Another thing that I’d like to note is that it’s impossible to be happy all the time. It is more about adopting healthy habits that give a boost on a regular basis.
A great book I can recommend in the context of happy habits is Habits of Happy Brain by Loretta Graziano Breuning.
