Person A: “Oh god, I just sawed off my hand! Help me!”

Person B: “Damn, I just stubbed my toe. That smarts…”

Person A: “Please! I’m bleeding really bad here!”

Person B: “Jeeze, I think I might have sprained my toe… I wonder if I should go to the hospital”

Person A: “Oh god, I’m feeling light headed”

Person B: “For goodness sakes, could you shut up already? You’re not the only one with problems!!!”

Person A: *passes out*

Person B: “Ugh, finally — better call an ambulance for this toe”