Blizzcon 2013: The Cosby Suite

Content Warning: this article contains references to Bill Cosby and his crimes, as well as references to harassment and discrimination.

By now you have probably heard about the “Cosby Suite” at Blizzcon 2013 and you may have seen pictures of me in attendance, holding up the poster.

I wanted to share what I wrote when I was asked for comment earlier today. It was a hard decision to request anonymity. On the one hand, as I say below, the last thing women need is more men taking up air time. On the other, I haven’t seen many people standing up to take responsibility. Everyone is just hoping not to be noticed, and this is not any way to change. This is why I am writing this now.

This is the statement I sent:

I would rather keep this anonymous but I appreciate the opportunity to comment on this. Right now I think we need to listen and amplify all the voices that are really hurting during this time. The last thing they need is another male voice explaining what happened.

I am not defending these images, but I do want to offer context, as I attended that party at the “Cosby” suite. There must have been close to 100 people at the party, Blizzard employees and also their spouses, friends, and even family. Back then, in 2013, the suite was named after Cosby because of the hideous carpet that reminded us of his sweaters and not, as we would all find out a year later, the allegations leveled against the actor that once played Dr. Huxtable.

The image of that actor on that poster once stood as a beacon of my childhood. Someone I knew could make me laugh during my awkward high school years in the 80s. But Cosby hid a terrible and dark secret. Once I became aware of his history of rape, the image of him from my childhood was gone, replaced by something immeasurably dark.

That picture disgusts me now. Looking at it feels like a punch in the stomach, I can only imagine what it feels like for others. That is no longer Dr. Huxtable and his trademark sweaters on that poster, but a rapist. The following year the theme was changed to a dinosaur, but the sadness of the previous year lingered in all of us.

I feel confident that none of the dozens of men and women in those photos knowingly held up a picture of a monster for a photo op, beers in hands, silly smiles on their faces. I am not denying there were problems. Was it professional to have a giant suite party, with alcohol, where fans mixed with devs and family? Definitely not. Some of the pictures in the series have women holding up the poster, but a lot of them do not. Too many of them do not. In the best cases we were not inviting and including their voices, in the worse cases we were actively destroying them. Were there systemic problems at Blizzard? Absolutely. The stories are horrifying. I am glad we are pausing to reflect, reevaluate, and listen — something we should have been doing all along.

After making that statement, I learned that the suite was named after Cosby because of a previous party during GDC of the same year, which I did not attend.

If you take nothing else away from any of this I want you to know this: when I first heard about the Cosby allegations (and Weinstein, and so many others, with allegations big and small) I thought it was appalling, but I also thought of course, it is the film industry, not us. Then I hear about Ubisoft, and Riot, and I think of course. They were bad. Not us though. Not me.

I want you all to resist the temptation to think now that it is Blizzard’s problem. I am here to tell you that this is not just a Ubisoft or a Riot or a Blizzard problem. It is you. It’s me. It is all of us as an industry.

All of us who missed what was in front of our faces. Who didn’t listen. Who excused and brushed off and ignored. Who never stopped to see that intent and impact are so very different. Who never stopped to consider the consequences of our actions. I still have so much to learn and so far to go. I know it is not and will never be enough, but I still want to say I’m sorry.

We have to be better.

Ever since I played my first game of D&D while growing up in Mexico and Canada, I knew I wanted to make games. Whether it was Relic, Ubisoft, Blizzard or now Bonfire it’s my colleagues that make working in games so special. Right now many of my colleagues are hurting. While making games is fun, it is time for us to grow up as an industry. Time to level up and change.