Just Start, Don’t Stop and Enjoy the Bits In Between

Joanne Goh
Jul 10, 2017 · 4 min read
from www.livelifehappy.com

When I first thought about a break from work, I envisioned pursuing dramatic changes or new passions. Learn to play the guitar. Lose 40 pounds. Become a supermodel. (This last one is not on my list. I just had to be sure you got to the end of the first paragraph).

I pondered an extensive list of things I wanted to do. But I was stuck. My internal player had many excuses on repeat mode:
“You won’t sustain this”
“It didn’t work the last time”
“You don’t want this enough”

Fear of failure was holding me back from even trying
For the things I wanted to do, my mind raced to the Worst Possible Outcome (WPO). At work, this might be crouched as “scenario planning”. In the space of personal development, WPO happens due to Ponderous Paranoia (PP). This is where we overthink things and how they might turn out. (These ridiculous terms were coined by yours truly. They are genuine products of what happens when you overthink.)

I was overcomplicating what it took
For what I wanted to try, I would list down ALL the things I felt would be needed. These lists would build and reinforce my inertia. For example, running might require shoes, attire, running watch, pressure socks, a visor, joining a club etc, etc.

All being said and done, I had to decide what I wanted to focus on and START. The alternative of wrestling with Analysis-Paralysis and Ponderous Paranoia was NOT acceptable.

Instead of trying to figure out the longer-term goals in too much detail, I decided to zoom in on the day-to-day. What was I doing that was self-sabotaging in these areas? What persistent habits were not helping me move forward when it came to the big three (mind, body and soul)? The self-audit revealed time wasters (social media), health busters (sleeping at 2am) among other things. I was also not investing time in learning anything new.

The result was a trimmed list of new habits. Habits to start getting me healthier (body), learning (mind) and engaged (soul).

Armed with a list, I redefined success on my own terms:

  • Success is STARTING
    From “Getting Things Done” there is the 2 minute rule. Anything that can be done in 2 minutes should be done immediately. For the big things that cannot be done in 2 minutes start them doing too. Don’t wait for all the right variables, equipment or timing. Writing regularly was one of the new habits I put down. When I first started writing, I would light up aromatherapy candles and play relaxing music. By the time I started actually writing, it was time to go to sleep! On the contrary, a mindset change means I hustled and wrote bits of this post whilst on the train home and on 1% of phone battery life. Bits became paragraphs, paragraphs became the article you are reading now. Because I started, I got some bits going.
  • Success is expecting failure and making a plan for it.
    There will be days of naysayers, discouragement and inexplicable moods. When it happens, breathe and cut yourself some slack. Then just get back on the train, you do actually have somewhere to go.
  • Success is the courage to chuck it when it needs to be chucked.
    We tend to carry dead weight unknowingly e.g. dragging ourselves to finish a tedious book. This zaps our energy and time. If we end up hanging on for all the wrong reasons, we end up exhausted and discouraged. If we constantly eyeball for possible dead weights, we can then decide on their fate and move forward. It is the courage to say “No”, “Nadda”, “Not Now”, “Not This”. It works like the ‘Hire slow, fire fast’ mantra.
  • Success means not stopping
    “It’s not what we do once in a while that shapes our lives. It’s what we do consistently.” ― Anthony Robbins
    Turn up, just do it. Keep doing it. Don’t stop. In our Insta-world, it is difficult when we don’t get to see the results immediately. I currently experience this daily when it comes to keeping on the Whole30 program. I would like to weigh myself every minute but I won’t. I need to follow the rules and trust the process (and avoid the food aisles in Japanese supermarkets…)
  • Success is enjoying the bits in between
    Between the start and end of a thing is a series of bits. New bits, bad bits, good bits. Enjoy and remember them. I track these in a daily gratitude list. Looking at this list when I’m feeling dispirited reminds me there are a lot of things along the way to celebrate and enjoy.

It has been around 20 days since I started. One app I’ve found to be tremendously useful is Momentum. It is a habit tracking app. Input the habit you are trying to change and the number of times you want to do it each week. Each time you complete something, enter it on the app, there is a little “ping!”. A streak of completions gets you a small note of encouragement. It is a simple app but it has helped me keep myself in line and as the app name implies, build momentum.

I give myself 70 out of 100 so far:
Getting my butt off the chair and just doing things (most of the time) Getting past bad days and doing things (most of the time)
Getting things that need to be done consistently (some of the time)
Chucking things when they need to be chucked (Not yet, noticing intellectual hoarding tendencies that need to be dealt with)
Enjoying the bits in between (some of the time, not enough)
It’s good progress and it will get better.

Most of all, I’m glad I started and am enjoying the bits in between.

Joanne Goh

Written by

A recovering workaholic. Currently savoring moments and enjoying conversations.

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