These are all issues with the person in the relationship -- not the relationship itself. Feeling not enough, for example, is part of that person's wound, and they've picked a partner who taps that wound. In conscious relationship we heal these kinds of internal subconscious wounds. Same with "you don't know who you are" and "you abandon your friendships" -- that is a character trait of the person. If you are back-burnering your needs, your friendships, etc, this signals your own codependence and again, you have likely picked a partner who perfectly matches with a codependent person -- it's likely the partner doesn't abandon their needs, their friendships etc. These types of wound pairings provide opportunity for growth when approached consciously and with the right tools.