Dear Jordan Part V
Your Father misses you. I haven’t seen you in nearly two weeks and I know in terms of a newborn’s development, that’s an eternity. I know that you can now wave and clap. Your Daddy is so proud of you and loves you. Sometimes I get so lost in myself that I forget you even exist. Those times are the hardest and I need to pinch myself to get out of the engulfing funk. My love for you is now intertwined into my DNA and will never leave.
I feel abominably for your mother. She has to deal with so much. Work a 46 hour work week. Take care of an injured dog, work full time, and be a single mom.
Side note: While walking Paco & Jordan last week during Rosh Hashana at her sister’s settlement in The West Bank, Paco was attacked and biten badly by a couple of other dogs. He required surgery from the wounds and is now wearing a cone for 10 days, then gets the stitches out. He will be OK.
Your mother truly is amazing and I know you already know that. She is your most cherished person in the world, and rightly so. I hope and trust that I will be the second, when I’m healthy. It’s crazy to me how much you have evolved. It’s almost like you’re an evolvoing Pokemon, gaining new superpowers by the day. You’re my little Charmander. My secret weapon and most prized gift.
I don’t know how your mother does it. I had a mental break down from working full time and seeing you four to five times a week for a few hours a day. I just couldn’t handle the stress and pressure. Your mother spends nine hours at work, comes home to take care of you, then herself. She never has time to take care of her own needs, and is truly a superwoman, as I’ve previously mentioned. Moral of the story is that you have an amazing mother and a Daddy who is doing his best to become amazing.
Sometimes Daddy forgets the madness of where he is when talking to other patients. It scares him when their personalities change from friendly to sullen. He is with shuddery people and would much rather be with you.
Lots of love,