Getting Strong Now

Slowly, I complete decline pushups with my legs propelled from my bed. After showering, I put on the rehabilition center given clothing and enjoy the way it makes my muscles pop. In America, I’d be an average Joe, but in Israel, my size makes me far from it. People assume I’m a basketball player and a few have asked what Israeli league team I play for. In the States, I’d just be a lanky 6'4 kid who looks like they occasionally hit the gym.

My father tells me I need to get my body right, as well as my mind. My father was never the alpha male who barks instructions. It’s probably what I needed. He is still an alpha male in his own right, but more in the lead by example and lone wolf type. I consider myself the lone wolf type too. I don’t go out of my way to lead people around, but I also dont listen to instruction. I do what I think’s best. That clearly hasnt worked until this point.

I can’t lie. I can’t stand being in this mental health rehabilitation center. The worst part is that on the 24th of this month, I am getting transferred to another facility that specilizes in alcoholism. That means I will have been hospitlized for over six weeks when it’s all said and done.

I can’t stand being here. I’m no Albert Einstein or Brad Pitt, but I don’t belong around this motley crew. I’m frustrated and I just want a fucking drink. Yes, it would turn into two, then three, then five, and so on. You get the point, yes? Being here is so devishly boring. I’ve already read two books. One on hinduism. Fucking hinduism. This pothead, alcoholic fuckup is reading books on hinduism. OK, so great. I’ve read two books. The other was The Alchemist. I was too affected by the valium I was on to remember what it was really about. Now, I’m reading an amazing book by Jodi Picoult that I literally can’t put down.

I have too much time on my hands. More pushups and reading to come. See you guys soon. Much love.