This story is unavailable.

It’s really funny to read this comment because the original draft of this piece was titled “The Alphabet Song is Just, Like, Totally Fine the Way It Is” and the full text of the article was, “Everything’s cool, everybody.”

But then I started editing it and it sort of just snowballed into the current version.

One clap, two clap, three clap, forty?

By clapping more or less, you can signal to us which stories really stand out.