Dad Sues MLB Over Son Not Being Drafted

SCRANTON/WILKES BARRE, PA — Citing hefty expenses paid out over the little league and high school baseball career of his son, a Pennsylvania man is suing Major League Baseball for $195 million.

Butch Maxwell, and unemployed welder from Easton, PA explains, “T.C. (his son) was born to play major league baseball. We even named him Ty Cobb Maxwell to give him every edge we could. From the time he first started to walk, I had professional coaches come to the house and work out with him. The camps we sent him to were grueling and expensive but they promised it would give him the best possible chance to become a big-leaguer.”

“We sold our house and moved into a camper so we could travel to the best kids’ tournaments. I did research on the Internets and found a guy in Ohio who was making bats made of molybdenum. It wasn’t cheap and it may not have been entirely legal (Little League rules do not state an explicit prohibition on the use of exotic materials such as molybdenum) but we did what we thought was best for T.C.’s career.”

Molybdenum bats aside, an ever bigger financial shock came to the Maxwell family when their son’s surgery was not covered by their insurance.

“When T.C. was 8 years old, he got a really bad sunburn playing in a tournament in Florida. We saw an excellent opportunity and rushed him to a doctor in Miami who was doing Tommy John surgery for many of the Major League pitchers. We had to pay it out of pocket but it did add an extra 7 mph to his fastball. Scouts look for that kind of thing.”

When asked how he arrived at the $195 million sum, he explained, “The way I figure it, between custom bats, coaches, camper, travel expenses, and Tommy John surgery, that stuff really adds up. And when you include Major League income of $150 million…we just want what’s fair, ya know?”

As of this writing, the Maxwell family still has not been contacted by the Yankees or any other Major League organization.

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