By Any Other Name

Words and names and bodyslams

We’ve had the pleasure of seeing and hearing the word “pussy” a good deal the last few days.

No, it wasn’t thanks to Amy Schumer’s new stand up special (I missed it coming into town on Sunday, actually). It wasn’t a Howard Stern reunion tour of some sort (though he came into play over this weekend as well). It was owing to our GOP Presidential candidate. Isn’t life just funny like that?

Except it’s not. Not in this case at least.

In a world in which morality and family values are ‘going down the drain,’ you’d hope that the people selling us that narrative would — how can I say it in a way they’d understand? — stop being absolute pussies when it comes to the wanna be Cesspool-in-Chief.

(In case you just got offended by a word: don’t worry! It’s totally cool to use that word these days. No harm no foul thanks to ol’ Trump. Make America assaulty/great again, am I right?)

Unfortunately you CANNOT count on those people to have a spine. They pawned theirs off right after selling their souls. I’m looking at you Senator Ted Cruz, Paul Ryan, and crew.

Countless so called ‘conservatives’ are defending a person who shows little to no sign of conservative values. Self proclaimed evangelicals are putting more stock in email servers than basic human decency.*

“But what’s human decency, John?” Good question! For starters, it’s something you would hope you’d be able to assume or expect from anyone being stamped with approval by those who lay claim to the Ultimate Source of morality. Swing and a miss, I say, Dr. Dobson.

What are we to do when this group defends these events as ‘locker room’ banter, guys being guys, or golf course discussions? Their arguments and defenses certainly smell like a locker room since locker room talk, while crude, is usually not criminal.

Shakespeare put it rightly many years ago when saying “A rose by any other name would smell as sweet.” In our present case it’s the inverse. A rancid crap pile will still smell as you’d expect no matter what you call it, even “Evangelical Right.”

Thus, I think it’s time for the misnomer to be resolved. You see, despite the claims from the mind-void that is the Trump base, words do still matter. They carry meaning and contain concepts concerning the real world.

It’s how we communicate and progress as people and thus as a society. When words suddenly lose meaning — enter sidebar to discuss transgenderism’s linguistic oddities that now ironically play against the very people who used to make so much ruckus in Target over it all — we have a right to throw up our hands and politely yell “WTF?!”

So, “conservative” and “evangelical” simply will no longer do.

Conservatives no longer seek to conserve anything besides their own power and cultural toehold. Thankfully for the rest of us we can rest assured that it’s already quickly dissipating. Conservatives are otherwise quite liberal in that any means to that end will do — even Trump.

They aren’t evangelists as the term evangelical is supposed to denote, either. Well, at least not evangelists about that. Rather, their evangelism only goes as far as the cultural or political items they’re currently feeling gosh-darn pissy (not ‘pussy’) about. The hot topic cultural bugaboos will suffice. “Go ye and make [conservative] disciples, [torching the earth via culture wars].” Or something like that.

Any means will do—even Trump

Their idea seems to be that we need the cultural thermostat set to exactly what they’d prefer it until the blessed Rapture occurs, thank you very much. The rest of us godless asshats can do whatever we’d like when the world falls apart during the Apocalypse.

So while I don’t know what words will do justice to this clusterfu—wait, can I say that one? Or has Donald not made it ok yet?—I think it’s beyond indisputable—and more so every week thanks to their high-contrast, ultra-tinted ME-ssiah—that we should find better labels. And fast.

Until then, I suppose “pussies” will do. Trump, true to his word, clearly has grabbed plenty of them within the party that used to stand for something. And that without America’s consent.

* If national security is a big deal to you—as it ought to be—then you don’t have to dismiss the issues with Clinton. You do have to give honest weighting, however, to the fact that Trump this week read disinformation that was created by the Russian propaganda machine Sputnik, not to mention the legion of other concerns such as nuclear proliferation, treaty negotiations, temperament baiting, et. al.

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