The Rasoodocky

Twas dobby and the chellovecks—

That’s Pete, George, Dim, and me, the boss—

Did sit and drink some vellocet

When came this great goloss

“Beware the millicent, my droog!

His nozh to skrik, his hands that skvat!

Beware the staja godman well,

who vreds boys in their spat!”

I took my shlaga in my hand,

And said “Come malchiks, ookadeet!”

Then viddied I old Billy Boy

This did I gavoreet:

“Ho, ho! If it’s not stinking Bill,

I thought I nuked the smell of cal!

Come take it in the yarbles now,

You eunuch jelly thou!”

Bill dropped the young devotchka down

That they had stripped nagoy

He spat and flashed his britva out

And crarked “Let’s get ‘em, boys!”

One, two! Plesk, shive!

My brothers, ‘twas a glorious drat

They creeched and horned and dropped their knives

And ittied skorry back

Twas dobby, grand, and horrorshow

We droogs retired, fagged and fashed

I raised my glass of honeygold,

“A toast! To our next crast!”