Learn from Chester

Johnny Griffin
Jul 21, 2017 · 3 min read

I’m not sure why I choose to write this. I met Chester twice. The first time, he took a quick picture with me, and told me that plaid was stupid. I responded that he was not the “first to Durst”. Chester high-fived me. It felt respectful. Like a jab amongst bros. His experimentation with a super-dyed blonde dome was not unique. And he knew it.

The next time I would see him was years later. His hair was dark. Mine was white. The year was 2008. He instantly remembered me, and asked if I wanted to borrow his beanie to cover my stupid hair. I should have said yes.

I don’t know how it is that I meet relevant musicians. I’m no musician myself. I mean, I’m pretty sexy on a harmonica, and I can play “Free Fallin’” on a piano, but that’s about as musically inclined as I get. Yet, somehow, through my close radio friends, a smiling face, and a positive aura, I’ve always found myself in situations that actual music fans would be envious of.

I write these words knowing that people inevitably die. Like….all of us. The death of musicians rarely affect me. I mean, I’m still human, and people like Kurt, Jerry, etc all left a bit of a mark on my musical soul. But, I get it. Although selfish, they left as artists. They left with an actual physical mark on so many. Their legacy is untarnished. We may be angry on the “why”, but we all know that they left a mark on our soul through their lyrics and artistry.

I’m 40. All those in that Seattle, grunge era left indelible marks on my soul. RATM, Sound Garden, PJ, Nirvana. All of them inspired me to be a better version of myself. And, then there was a gap. A gap in my most formidable years. A gap that was filled by my newfound computer nerd friends.

“Burned CD’s” were the new rage, and somehow a copy of “Hybrid Theory” happened in my possession for the low cost of $5. That CD never left my ears for 2 years.

Music is a thing. The talent is subjective. What matters the most is timing of a song, and how we relate. We all relate to certain songs in completely different contexts. “In the End” will always resonate with my soul. I was a passionate young kid, and didn’t know a thing about love. I moved to a completely new town, away from the comforts of home. Away from my first love, after a traumatizing break up. Those lyrics, once found, meant everything to me.

“It starts with one thing

I don’t know why

It doesn’t even matter how hard you try

Keep that in mind

I designed this rhyme

To explain in due time

All I know

Time is a valuable thing

Watch it fly by as the pendulum swings

Watch it count down to the end of the day

The clock ticks life away

It’s so unreal

Didn’t look out below

Watch the time go right out the window

Trying to hold on, but you didn’t even know

Wasted it all just to watch you go

I kept everything inside

And even though I tried, it all fell apart

What it meant to me

Will eventually be a memory of a time when

I tried so hard

And got so far

But in the end

It doesn’t even matter.”

Those words will always resonate with me. Resonate when I deal with depression…Resonate when I desire to make a difference…Resonate when I take a deep breath and know that Time really is a valuable thing.

Love yourself. Love others. If you’re sad, reach out. Sadness is real. Depression is real. But, there is hope. There is opportunity.

The loss of Chester through suicide is the first to truly reach my soul. I’ve lost so many. But, I hope as you read the things that unfold in the coming days/weeks/months, you realize that you are not alone.

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Johnny Griffin

Self-proclaimed world renown author. Excessive embellisher. Discoverer of new words. Fancy beard grower.

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