New Data Shows Americans Still Getting Fatter

New Data Shows Americans Still Getting Fatter: According to a new study, Americans are getting fatter and fatter, with the only state having an obesity rate below 20% being Colorado. Wow, that’s just outrageous. Why the hell aren’t people in surrounding states sharing any of their snacks with the people of Colorado?

Man Shoots Wife Showing Her Gun Isn’t Loaded: A woman is recovering from a serious gunshot wound to her legs after her husband attempted to demonstrate to her that a 9mm handgun brought into their home by a friend was not loaded. In her husband’s defense, after the gun discharged and shot her in the leg, the weapon really was no longer loaded. So, in some respect, I suppose one could argue the husband was actually half-right. On the other hand, others may argue that it doesn’t matter if the husband was half-right, because the poor wife is half-dead.

Texas Man Becomes World’s First Trillionare After Bank Error: Texas resident Reggie Theus got the shock of his life after checking his bank account one day only to discover there was a balance of over $4 trillion in it. Oddly enough, for the first time ever, Mr Theus briefly became a man who was in possession of so much wealth, even Republicans were offended.

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