Fireworks & PTSD: How Not To Be A Jerk

A few days ago, a post on nextdoor.com showed up in my feed. A post which describes neighbors using (supposedly) illegal fireworks which caused a PTSD episode with his son, who is a veteran.

Within this post, it was stated sarcastically, that he hoped those using the fireworks were “proud of themselves” for causing an episode. Replies including a statement accusing those using fireworks of purposefully “traumatizing” a nephew. The resounding answer was to call the police, to use the government to hammer the nail they need to drive into the wall.

Government has stolen our communities from us by creating a myraid of rules and punishment to which we can use them as a weapon to fight minor issues. We know less and less of our neighbors due to government to “taking care” of our problems, more and more. There are less friendly waves and conversations over the fence and more suspicious gazes and anonymous calls to city hall.

How do we not allow this theft by government? Start by working on the smaller issues, start by not being a jerk with fireworks.

Do you love Fireworks?

• Don’t use them too late at night. Your community might have silly sound ordinances that come in effect before it is dark. While you may decide it’s worth the risk, there is a difference between a violation at 9:30 PM and one at 1:30 AM.
• Talk to your neighbors. While most people expect the 4th of July to have a large number of fireworks being used, sales are legal throughout June until a little after the 4th of July. If you want to have some fun with a big batch, give your neighbors a heads up. It’s not just sound and light but smoke as well that can bother your neighbors.
• Consider another location. Does your neighbor have a sign up stating they’re a veteran and it may cause PTSD event? Ask yourself if your 30 minutes of enjoyment is worth hours of terror for a neighbor. Hopefully, it is determined that this is a morally bankrupt position and go to a family or friends house.

Do fireworks cause you or a family member significant harm?

• Talk to your neighbors. No, your neighbor isn’t a jerk or stupid for liking fireworks. Nor are they trying to hurt you. Ignorance isn’t a personality flaw. You can’t fault someone not knowing that their actions may hurt someone. Make a sign or order one, such as the one that can be ordered via this site. A yard sign alone may not be enough, going door to door with a flyer may be necessary. You can’t assume your neighbors pass your sign or took notice. If your neighbors are currently using fireworks that are causing an episode, talk with them, explain what is happening.
• Provide options for your neighbor. If your neighbor wants to use fireworks and was willing to discuss this with you. Reward the behavior. Come to an agreement of a time/date where you can go somewhere, a friends house or to dinner while fireworks are being used. Try to be flexible.

These tips won’t work every time, some people are jerks. You may ask a neighbor to provide you with a time that will work, to which they’ll reply in anger that they shouldn’t have to accommodate you. You may have a situation where your neighbor knows the difficulty you’re having and doesn’t care.

The best time to get to know your neighbors is when there isn’t a problem. When this is done, resolving issues, when they occur, are much easier.

Strong communities behave in this manner and weak ones have the city fight their personal battles. Let us try to make our communities stronger.