The Confessions of an Ex-Coffee Snob
and how to avoid becoming one by understanding the narcissism of small differences
Whether it be the unified hate against Cherry MX browns amongst keyboard enthusiasts or home baristas laughing at blasphemous claims that Starbucks has the best coffee, one great thing about such ‘common enemies’ is that it serves as a glue that brings these small communities closer together. The norms established through consensus by the community serve as a common language and a baseline medium for members of a community to connect with each other. However, when used as a tool to assert the false notion of being ‘in the know’ or ‘superior’ to others out of the community, it becomes a double-edged sword that serves the interests of a few bad actors in the community, at the expense of the health and growth of the community as a whole.
When I first fell down the coffee rabbit hole, I couldn’t wrap my head around how some cafes could put so little attention to the coffee that they sold and get away with it. Neither could I understand the customers who would frequent these cafes. Over time, however, I came to the realisation that coffee is about so much more than coffee. It wasn’t about the science of coffee extraction, but about the unique roles, coffee played in each person’s life. It wasn’t about paying attention to the coffee, but about the experience in a cafe as a whole. It wasn’t about geeking out about coffee, but the conversations that happened through coffee.
In other words, I was being narcissistic about the small differences between myself and others. Viewing the world through a lens that focused on the similarities rather than differences, I realised that the truth is that I had more in common with others than I did with differences. This lesson carries over to all other fields as a reminder to avoid letting the innate desire of asserting my sense of individuality create conflict with others.
Further Reading:
