Do you ever wonder what your purpose is? When is it time to make a change?
During the last 10 years I’ve learned that I need to do work with purpose and meaning, alongside people with similar ethics and values. I enjoy knowing that my work has had a positive impact on people’s lives and that it contributes to the advancement of society. Which led me to Co-Found a social enterprise in 2016 with a mission of achieving Equality and Diversity in STEM, through the work of InnovateHer. It was a relief to find this purpose as I’d been working in digital for over 10 years and experienced firsthand the imbalance created by a lack of representation in the industry. I’m passionate about creating a more diverse and equal sector, and it’s been a joy to contribute towards manifesting this.
Letting go
I’m resigning as a Director of InnovateHer at the end of the year to start a new chapter. It’s surreal to be typing those words after 5 years of building the company from an optimistic idea rooted in making society more equal, into the tangible, sustainable and thriving entity it is today. There’s also personal and emotional ties to the company borne out of nurturing something, a bit like the attachment you might feel to a plant grown from a seed, a pet, or even a child. Through this nurturing process you learn a lot about yourself, what you’re capable of and how much you have to give. It tests your limits and teaches you resilience. I’ve learned a lot about attachment, and an equal amount about the importance of knowing when to let go. But how do you even start to untangle your identity from your business, when you are the Co-Founder and your personality is at the very core?
As Co-Founder, I’ve enjoyed a close and rich relationship with my business partner, Chelsea Slater. We’ve been through a lot together and seen the best (and worst!) in each other. We’ve strived to build a business culture which mirrors our dynamic, based on openness, trust and respect. Running the business through a pandemic bought us exceptionally close. There’s nothing like an apocalypse to test your mettle, and it certainly tested both of us. Yet we endured, we survived and this year we even thrived!
I’m so proud of everything we’ve achieved over the past 5 years and especially the past 18 months. We’re about to turnover nearly half a million, we’ve won multiple awards, doubled the team size, and put the effort in to get a diverse, experienced and inspirational board in place. We pivoted last year to become an eLearning provider and have big ambitions to reach thousands of girls through the platform in 2022. This year we won a significant contract which means we have financial stability for the foreseeable future. 2021 far surpassed our expectations, after spending 2020 wondering if we’d survive.
Ikigai
It now feels like the right time for me to start a new chapter. Looking back at the past couple of years the business has transformed and coinciding with this I’ve been on a journey of immense personal growth. It has been painful at times, but I’ve been fortunate to have some incredible mentors to guide me through it. A huge thank you to my coach, Hilary Farrington and mentor Tony Foggett. They’ve shared their time, knowledge and wisdom and helped me to gain clarity on what I’m seeking.
It’s essentially this - Ikigai. If you’ve read the book, you’ll know what that means. This diagram sums it up perfectly:
Image credit: Ikigai taken from the World Economic Forum
So that sweet spot in the middle — the ‘reason for being’ — that’s the aim. I’ve come to recognise that what I’m good at and what I can be paid for isn’t necessarily what brings me joy. As the business grows, it doesn’t delight me to picture myself heading up Operations, Product or Fundraising (although I’ve done these things and so much more over the years!) I’ve learned that I love the challenge of setting something new in motion, creating something from nothing, making it real. I thrived during the initial period when we didn’t know how we were going to make it sustainable or make an impact. I enjoy the unknown, the intellectual challenges which come with designing business models, new products and services, the pitching of ideas to see if they gain traction, and the constant evolution.
Making space for change
This year I went through a period of deep reflection about whether I was truly the right person to lead the business through this next phase of scaling. The prospect of scaling and managing people doesn’t excite me, which is valuable insight. During this reflection I began to see the value in being able to let it go now. I could see the opportunities for growth it would bring if I stepped back; it creates so much space for others to step into.
I enjoyed this article about why Co-Founders don’t need to be CEO’s. I attended a weekend retreat rooted in Non Violent Communication and the Work That Reconnects by Joanna Macy, and came away with the mantra ‘make space for change’. I began to feel that I had a broader contribution to make within society, especially at this critical moment in time as we emerge from the pandemic. This feeling grew until I could no longer ignore it.
The next chapter
During this period of reflection an email landed with the news that Catalyst were recruiting for two Producers. I’ve followed the work of Catalyst, an initiative currently incubated by CAST, for quite some time. I admire the writing of Ellie Hale, currently the sole Producer of the Catalyst team, working alongside Debby Mulling as Strategic Partnerships Manager. So when I saw an opportunity to join them, I was very excited.
The work involves providing direct support and capacity-building to nonprofit organisations, alongside building a technical and relational infrastructure to enable their transformation through effective use of digital, data and design. In essence, it involves enabling other people to do good through developing open source reusable tech, a culture of open working, and diverse cross-sector communities of practice to help decide what ‘good’ looks like. At this pivotal moment in time, I believe that it really matters that we harness the power of tech for good, to counter the negative narrative and applications of technology across the globe, and to help society find ways to move forward through the multiple deep transitions we’re experiencing.
Inclusion always brings me joy
The recruitment process was so impressive that I knew I was on the right path. After spending years advising companies on how to alter their recruitment practices to attract a more diverse candidate pool, it was heartening to see how Catalyst, advised by Collaborative Future, had designed their process in a really inclusive way. There were no CV’s, no lengthy forms, and a ‘blind’ panel. I simply had to answer three thought provoking questions focussing on my views on societal changes post pandemic, how digital can enable positive change, and how to build networks. It was a joy to complete! You can read more about how Catalyst designed this process on their blog.
I knew I’d found my new reason for being. So when Ellie offered me the job, I was over the moon. The other Producer joining the team, Siana Bangura, is a Founder / activist, a social commentator, poet and performer. I’m thrilled to be working with Ellie, Siana and the wider Catalyst network to co-create a thriving community of people doing good things.
Onwards…
Acknowledging mourning is an important part of letting go. I’m sad to be leaving InnovateHer, but I’ll be staying on the advisory board. InnovateHer is in a great place now and with the solid leadership team we’ve built, I’ve no doubt that it will continue to grow and make an impact in 2022. I’m looking back at all we’ve achieved with a lot of pride and feeling deep gratitude for the chances I took and the lessons I learned along the way.
I’m very much looking forward to my new beginning and all the learning opportunities it brings. Feeling fortunate to have found my Ikigai and to be able to put it into action, not just once, but many times over. I’ve learned that the way to discover your reason for being is to simply be in tune with your heart and mind. Then you will recognise the opportunity, when it presents itself. And it might be scary taking that risk, but I love the saying from the Ikigai book; “happiness is always determined by your heart.”
I’ll be working in the open once I’ve joined the Catalyst team, so follow me here if you’ve an interest in my journey and the vital work that they do.
