If you’re not getting what you want, it’s because you don’t have your head right. Loosen up, stop protecting and defending that part of your ego (you know what it is) that you think makes you better — or stop stomping on that part of yourself that you think makes you “worse.” It’s these behaviors — not the behaviors of others, directly — that hold us back most.
It is not that we have a short time to live, but that we waste a lot of it. Life is long enough, and a sufficiently generous amount has been given to us for the highest achievements if it were all well invested. But when it is wasted in heedless luxury and spent on no good activity, we are forced at last by death’s final constraint to realize that it has passed away before we knew it was passing. So it is: we are not given a short life but we make it short, and we are not ill-supplied but wasteful of it… Life is long if you know how to use it.
does this manifest itse…t you still feel apart? Grand loneliness can arrive cloaked in a long con of community. Succinctly: Loneliness isn’t feeling like you don’t really know anybody. It’s feeling like nobody could ever really know you. How does this manifest itself?
“Psychiatry and cardiovascular students, they don’t even speak to each other in medical school. Nobody understands at all at the moment the relationship between the two things. For me, getting a really clear picture of their connection is going be the big yield in the end.”
In the domains of behavioral, neurocognitive and respiratory sciences, multiple studies using the Dunedin project have alleged that environmental surroundings can be the trigger for genetic response, linking the two inexorably. For instance, one study showed that genes predicted which abused children later developed antisocial violent behavior; another showed genes predicted which highly stressed adults developed depression (Moffitt notes that “the jury is still out” on replication of this second study). The larger suggestion is that it is the combination of the right environment and genetic cocktail that causes mental illness — not nature versus nurture, but, as author Matt Ridley has written, nature via nurture.
I’ve learned I need cooperative over competitive and kind over cool in a relationship. Interesting intrigues me more than fun. Soul mate over sex god. I’d rather be with someone than do with someone. My spirit needs relaxation, comfort and joy. If my mate needs a challenge or a mission to undertake, let it be to protect my calm and light up my insides. If given a soft place to land, I open up and spill warmth easily. If I feel at ease and at home, I’m my best self and my best self loves freely.