Read on for mention of cows

My Brain Started Talking

Some people can talk to friends about anything at all, simply to enjoy each other’s company or for the joy of chatting. It deepens the relationship somehow. I find I can often only exchange solid information, staying in the safe realm of facts and current affairs. But here is me, in a 4am stupor, thinking out loud, attempting to release the brakes. Brace yourself.

There are times when you don’t know what to write but you feel there is something within waiting to be shared. It’s a complex mumbo jumbo of almost thoughts and wisps of ideas. Possibly excellent, potentially exquisite. History has taught me it amounts to nothing. Nothing worthwhile anyway. The moment it is stored or banked, spoken or written, it is sort of useless. But perhaps I’m looking for information again. In my need to stay with convention and the familiar maybe I obstruct free thinking.

What happens when our minds wonder free? Or maybe wander free? When did that last happen? For longer than ten seconds. Is an hour spent wondering and mulling things over insanity? Unproductive? What did monks get up to? Maybe it’s a chance to switch off and allow a break. Do we avoid that which is best for us? No! But some of us d0 avoid the alien and the challenging. Silence isn’t golden it’s flipping hard.

I realise my life revolves mostly around TV. Not traditional naff TV but High Quality TV which can provide water cooler moments in the office. Something to talk about, an oasis in a desert of small talk and grimaces. But Netflix and iPlayer and 4OD clog up my mind. They don’t release it or give it rest. It’s well made TV, some programmes you could say are art even, but is it worth all my free time? Why can’t I pick up one of those books on that pile? My eyes don’t like the words on the page, I’m just not interested in reading a book no matter how good it supposedly is. Am I alone or is technology making us all numb to change? It surrounds us in a warm blanket of familiar mush. Being a little towards the autistic end of the spectrum I need all the pushing I can get to talk and interact with people. It’s healthy to converse, of course it is. So why don’t these things which pull us away from people carry a warning? The dazzling content is so addictive I guess we’d just ignore it anyway.

But kids should be taught in school to revel in books and nature and art by those most passionate about them. Whose idea was it to bring ipads into the classroom? Half the children have them at home. If they’re gonna be spending thousands on stuff make it special and eye opening. A telescope. A grand piano. A small herd of cows (clutching at straws here). Vets and farmers could come in and explain how the bits work (I’m running with it).

I miss those moments when I’m silenced by nature. Nature is tricky when you’ve grown up and live in a city. We have parks. Again, we have all we need so why go looking for the barren beauty? That mountain is great but can you buy a kebab after 2am?

I’m reminded of Karl Pilkington reasoning that there is no need to travel to far away or dangerous places because he can watch them on TV. He likes the simple life. We can all be like Karl. We forget what exploring feels like because we are happy exploring the internet.

Do we pass a point of civilization where we peak and start a decline into an uncivilised ‘civilised’ age? (Yes, I’m now confused by my own double meaning of civilised) How are we measuring civilisation? Look at those savages with their villages and communities and relatively little inequality!*(*This argument falls down when concerning healthcare, gender issues, education and all the other issues we know weren’t the best for out ancestors)

Marx said religion was the “sigh of the oppressed creature, the heart of a heartless world, and the soul of soulless conditions. It is the opium of the people”. In my opinion this isn’t exactly true. Personally I find faith is freeing and sobering and exciting all at once. It reminds me of who I am. Religion…umm…well…that’s more complicated.

Opium of the masses — I think this relates to our need for entertainment, to not need to think. Either stuff helps us engage with the real world and people around us or it doesn’t. Manufactured and wholesale distraction, bundles of unlimited content all at our fingertips. This is our new opium.

Goodnight Jonny. Goodnight Brain.

Switch Brain off. Place Brain back in box. Attempt to reset melatonin levels. Sleep.

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