I think the “need” framing of the piece — from the headline to its repetition as a trope in the article — is pretty clear: it’s designed to hook into the common “but nobody needs an AR-15” refrain, and attract attention. It’s a rhetorical device, and I used scare quotes pretty liberally around the word “need” for that reason.

The actual intent of the piece is spelled out in fourth and fifth paragraphs — my agenda is to move the debate beyond ethnic stereotypes (i.e. ignorant rednecks) and penis size (I can’t believe this is still a thing, but see the latest from Samantha Bee) by educating people about the appeal that the AR platform has to ordinary Americans.

Most people have gotten this, but a few like yourself have missed it, and that’s probably my fault — I maybe should’ve spent more time massaging the opener.