Literally Just A List Of Startup Crap That Annoys TF Out Of Me.

Daily Blog #123

When you want me to pay you to participate in your incubator.

Nobody should ever have to pay to be in an incubator. They should be funded to participate. If you’re being asked to put down your own cash, that sounds like a scam. Run a mile. Don’t get involved.

When your founding team spend more time working on their pitch decks than their products.

The product matters. The pitch? Nowhere near as important. If you can create something truly great, you’ll shine through as long as your pitch is vaguely comprehensible. Get the product down. You’ll be in a much better position.

When you decide the best way to spend your investors’ money is to pivot into a completely different company they might never have funded in the first place…

A pivot is not the answer to life’s problems. If your startup didn’t work, and there’s money left over, give the money back and start something new. Stop trying to make it happen. Looking at you, Clinkle.

When your startup is in stealth mode.

I hate when people talk about this. It just sounds so immature. Stealth mode usually means “we think our idea is so amazing that we’re sure somebody is going to steal it” – newsflash, nobody wants your dumb idea. Execution is the only thing that matters.

When you don’t invite women and you want to invite me.

I’ve been invited onto panels with a crowd of about fifteen men and no women, and the reasoning has been that there weren’t any women available. That’s bullshit, and it’s a huge dealbreaker for me. I will turn that panel the fuck down.

Founders who can’t grasp the idea that not everybody wants their opinion on everything from VR to the best flour for making cupcakes.

Having success in one vertical does not mean you know anything about every other vertical in the world. You don’t have to stay in your lane, but you also aren’t the goddamn wikipedia of startup knowledge.

And you know what else?

Founders who call themselves libertarians but think that just means watching videos of Jordan Peterson and reading summaries of Ayn Rand on Wikipedia – dealbreaker.

Grant Cardonne – dealbreaker.

People who want you when you can make them look good and abandon you when they can’t get anything else out of you – dealbreaker.

Every piece of software being designed “for teams” because startups are getting pretty goddamn unoriginal – dealbreaker.

And that’s the truth 😂😂💯🍕👏🔥