What We Do To Ourselves Is Always Worse Than What We Do To Each Other.

Daily Blog #39

Humans are a complicated affair.

We’re all living together on what a certain scientist calls Spaceship Earth, hurtling through space.

We are, for all intents and purposes, alone in a vast universe, with millions of stars and planets arranged in an eternal cosmic dance.

And we still can’t text each other back 🙄📱

We get caught up in our lives and our roles and we start to be forgetful. We’re designed by evolution to love one another, and we do, when we find the time. When we find the tune.

It’s easy to hurt each other. It’s easy to treat each other like we’re disposable. But I think we need to remember something vitally important.

We’re always harder on ourselves.

What we do to ourselves, is always worse than what we do to each other.

We might hurt each other and ignore each other and forget each other, but the hurt we keep inside and the way we treat ourselves is so much more painful.

We let ourselves down, and then we make ourselves feel like crap.

We don’t forgive ourselves the way we forgive the people we love.

And when we hurt those people, it’s because we’re already so hurt by ourselves that we’re beyond our capacity to absorb the thorns.

When people hurt you, they’re feeling the same way.

If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that you have to understand that other people are struggling, internally, with an abusive monster; themselves.

You have to give them as much understanding and help as you can because honestly – we all are hurting.

Life doesn’t come down to punching back. It comes down to listening.

My promise is that I’m going to listen more. Listen more to the people around me who are showing the signs of a long term internal trench war of attrition.

I know I treat myself a lot worse than I’ve ever treated anybody. I know you feel the same, every single one of you. We all do, whether we want to admit it, or not.

And maybe it’s time to change that.

🍕 A hurt for a hurt is an eye for an eye. Show me one person who that helps? It ain’t you.

🍕 When a human being is struggling, you can add to their struggle by assuming the worst about them, or you can reduce it by assuming the best.

🍕 Nobody has to go through anything alone. They do, because we let them. Through our short temper, long memory and lack of empathy. Fuck that. Let’s shake it up.


🗓 I went to the Growth Hackers event organised by Dan Siepen last night and had a fuck tonne of free pizza and met some truly lovely human beings. It was awesome. Fantastic insights into data science and its role in solving complex multi-part tech and business problems.

I’m already a data science convert and being in startup marketing and content analysis I’ve done a fair bit of it.

I discovered a new sneaker store last night after the talk on data science. Went in, checked it out, and geeked over some BAPE drops.

🍕 Tonight, I’m out for a friend’s birthday.

🍕 Today, I’m at BlueChilli and then skating to Chippendale for a meeting.

🍕 Tomorrow, I’m sleeping the fuck in.

💡 The Daily Ask

Hit me up for any and all content collaborations: jon@jonwestenberg.com