What it feels like to overthink… with a lack of focus…

Are you an overthinker? I am. Do you feel like you’re spread too thin?! I am! Woooo, one more question and I would be trying to sell you something in an infomercial.

So, about this overthinking thing… I had a whole paragraph written out with an explanation that I thought made sense about, but I started to re-read it, it stopped making sense, and after a few attempts at editing, it’s now dead. And gone. Dead and gone… is a… OneRepublic song? No. Justin Timberlake… I’m probably wrong twice. I do this thing sometimes where I don’t wanna look something up because I feel like I should know; right now is one of those times.

I also just spent the last hour reading a bunch of articles about psychology by Karen Nimmo… it’s like she’s speaking right to me. Her articles are always on useful topics, her writing is easy to follow and makes you want to keep reading. Highly recommend.

So, I let myself spend time reading these articles during time that I would have normally been frustrated with myself for not working. I own my business, you see, and if I don’t work, ain’t nobody workin’.

Remember, this is about overthinking AND lack of focus. I won’t let ya down.

So, I created this Medium account after weeks of thinking about it. Yessss. Weeks, dudes. I thought of it while I was washing dishes one night. This is a real story; don’t roll your eyes at me. I thought: you don’t write anymore. For funsies. You should do that. & then I thought about all the times over the years I did attempt to start a blog and when I shared it with friends & families, they loved it, but eventually, I’d stop. I thought it’d be fun to do it differently this time.

So, after thinking about it for weeks, I’ve had a hell of a day today and I just thought… Now’s good.

Now, what the hell am I gonna write about? In general, this may end up being my 2017 LiveJournal… Maybe I just wanna write out what I’m feeling. But, I do have a sneaking suspicion that I’m not the only one who feels a lot of the things I feel, and so, whenever possible, I’m gonna try to be useful to others.

Here’s what I really know about overthinking: I am always grateful that I think more than the average Joe, because let’s be honest: many people would benefit greatly from thinking just a liiiittle more. But, I definitely take it too far. The fact that I am aware of — and annoyed by — it, is great news, though. That means I know when it’s happening and I have motivation to get better at not doing it. I won’t be unrealistic about it: my ass will always be an overthinker to some degree, but I would like to be less intense about it. Less Paris Geller about it. Points for getting that reference.

And here’s what I know about lack of focus: It’s incredibly frustrating and can be detrimentally discouraging. However, CREATING, like Karen talks about in one of her articles, is vital to clearing your head. After almost 6 hours of attempting to work earlier today and having similar days the whole last week… feeling like I’ve been getting nowhere, just allowing myself this time to write my feelings, to create these words on a screen… so simple, so overdue, so awesome. I already feel more focused.

Now, excuse me while I go re-read, overthink and wonder if I should post as is, add more, delete the whole thing…

Or maybe I’ll just post it.