Transcript of Donald Trump’s Remarks at a Black History Month Event

Good morning everyone. Good morning. Here we are. It’s Black History Month. Black. Lot of important things to learn. You know CNN, fake news, right, everyone knows it, they said I moved the MLK monument. They said I moved it. Terrible. Who am I, David Copperfield? How do I move a big stone slab? You can’t just move that, look at it. It’s huge, big monument. I saw David Copperfield make the Statue of Liberty disappear once, by the way. Great stuff, great guy. Nobody called him out on it though, nobody said, “Hey where’s the Statue of Liberty? That’s disrespectful, that’s not American.” Nobody said anything. Of course he brought it back. He’s a magician. Great guy, love his stuff. (Aide whispers in his ear.) His parents were what? (Aide whispers.) Jewish immigrants?

(Trump looks awkwardly to crowd. Awkward silence.)

Look I got some names on this paper here. Martin Luther King Jr. Great guy. Was a really powerful figure in the — the time, back in the 60s. Back when the Beatles were just getting started, you know, the Beatles. What’s your favorite Beatles song? Mine’s “Get Back.” Great song, great message. You think Martin Luther King listened to the Beatles? I doubt it. I bet he was an Al Green type of guy. Motown. Stuff black people listened to back then. Jazz. Whatever. So Martin Luther King, he really advanced rights, right, he advanced African-American rights. But he’s not here today, because he got killed. A guy killed him. Killed him at a hotel, I think. Just like John Lennon! Think about that.

(Awkward silence. Trump shuffles papers.)

Frederick Douglass. Two first names. This guy’s got two first names! It’s like if my name was Donald Robert. Man, they did some crazy stuff back in the … in the … when … when Frederick Douglass did … his thing. (Covers mic, whispers to Aide:) Is he alive? No? (To crowd:) His very important thing, back in the day. Slavery. Two first names, though! Crazy. Imagine CNN getting a hold of that info, right? “What’s his real name?” That’s the headline, right. “Is it Fred, or is it Doug?” Do you think they called him Fred Doug? Sounds like a German way of saying “fried dough.” (German accent.) Fred doug! Fred doug! Am I right, folks? Fox, now Fox treats me well, good people there, Fox would know his first name is Frederick, and that his second name was his last name, and not another first name. They’d know.

(Silence. Someone in the crowd coughs.)

Look we have to get tough on ISIS. We have to get tough on radical Islamic terrorists. We have to ensure the safety of the American people by banning — (Aide whispers in ear. Beat.) Black History Month. Very important time in history. Martin Luther King, Fred Doug, Rosie Parks, The Bron James, Carl Winslow, the guy from Police Academy who made all the sound effects. All very important people for African-Americans. We’re here today to celebrate their lives. Amen. (He walks off abruptly.)

(Beat. Aide quickly steps up to the mic.)

Aide (nervously): There’s … there’s a bag of Hydrox cookies in the lobby. One per person please.

(During this entire speech, Steve Bannon and the GOP Crew are busy stripping the copper piping from the walls and floor.)

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