Trump and Hillary aren’t the problem. We are.

The most disappointing thing for me tonight during the debate wasn’t the slander or the disillusioned versions of America’s past, present, and future represented by both sides… it was the lack of a handshake at the beginning.

The America I know is not a country where two of the people who have been chosen as the top two choices for their leader do not even have enough respect for each other that they can’t shake hands. While there is and always has been a lack of belief in almost everything the other side has to say, there has been a professional respect for each other, the duels notwithstanding.

Leaders lead. As my dad said, “The only thing necessary to be a leader are followers.” Tonight, I did not see two leaders debate for my vote for President; I saw two people represent the fallacy of a flawed concept of leadership.

For too long, it has been thought to be a good leader, they have to be perfect. We have idealized the strong ones who are stronger, faster, and better than everyone. Leaders are the ones who we admire, respect, and who inspire us.

And while that may be true, I also know that isn’t the entire picture. Leaders lead. And they lead by treating people like people. They are willing to share, not only their strengths, but also their weaknesses. They don’t act like they are greater than what they are, they are willing to confess failures and be real. They’re characterized by faithfulness, humility, and love.

True leaders don’t lead alone from the front, but rather, they invite the rest of the people to come up with them.

I didn’t see two leaders tonight. I saw two people who are the manifestation of our flawed definition of leadership. This isn’t my America.

Making America great again doesn’t start with the two people on stage tonight, it starts with us. Let’s be the leaders that we deserve: love our community, invest in our neighbors, and start a real grassroots campaign of actual impact.