Phases

joshua choy
Aug 27, 2017 · 3 min read

Life is separated into many phases, like different chapters in a book. When we’re young, we start writing the first pages of our novel. Slowly and surely, it fills up as the years and memories go by. The people in our lives are the characters the protagonist (which is us) meets who teach us invaluable lessons and some leave memories that we never forget. Some of them appear in all our chapters, some only in one or two. But it’s ok, because they contribute to the entire narrative.

Our experiences are like stories that we compile over the years. There are stories from our carefree youth, when the biggest worry was handing in homework. Then there are stories from our adolescence, a period of teenage angst and discovery and everything in between. A period where defiance is the norm because you don’t want anyone telling you what to do. You want to make your own way. You want to have your own adventures. You start learning about who you really are as a person. This phase of our life is where we begin to realise that the world is not as simple as before. But it’s still fun and rewarding. You have boundless energy but not the resources, so you make a list of things you want to do when you’re older. For me it was becoming a professional basketball player (obvious to say that doesn’t happen easily). You’re learning and growing and before you realise it, you’re almost as tall as your dad. Or maybe taller.

Then we move onto the phase that I’m currently in. The twenties. The I’m-a-young-adult-who’s-kinda-clueless phase. The phase where you learn about real responsibility. Tasks get entrusted to you and there are things that weigh on your shoulders, but you want to be dependable so you go ahead and try your best. People start to rely on you to get things done and you wonder if you’ll ever be capable enough to do a good job. But you try go ahead and try anyways, because that’s what responsibility is about. Making sure that you keep your end of the bargain, even if you have no clue about what you’re doing.

It’s also the phase where you realise that time moves quicker as you get older. You look at your parents and realise that they’re getting older. They were ageing all along, but you look at them now and it dawns on you that they’re mortal. One day you’ll be here and they won’t be there to guide you anymore. Your siblings are busy having their own lives and you rarely ever get to see them. When did your younger brother get so tall? When did you younger sister start having a boyfriend?

Your friends too are moving on. Some of them are experiencing what you wish you could experience. Some are stepping out of their comfort zone and trying things that you never would have expected them to. You’re proud and happy for them…but deep down you’re a little envious. You wish you could be in their shoes. You wish you were at that stage of life that they’re at. But you’re not. And it’s going to be some time till you get there yourself.

Then there’s you. You start worrying about the future. Financially responsible but far from financial freedom. You worry about your relationships (or lack thereof) with your friends, family. You worry about your relationship with God and if he’s looking at you with pride or with disappointment. You worry if you’re a good man/woman and if you’ll ever be half the person you set yourself out to be. There are so many things going on.

But it’s just a phase.

Sure, some of these things never end. You end up worrying about them forever. But I guess it’s okay. Because you never stop growing and learning. A day will pass the same it did yesterday, today and tomorrow. And this phase of life will pass. It’ll just be another chapter in your book to add to your plot.

And hopefully, the day will come when you look back and read it with a smile upon your face.

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