A response to Day 6 : Yearn

Today is Day 6 of #FuckThisShit and I was struck by two things: The word yearn, and the discussion on normalcy.

My wife and I have been blessed with two (going on three) beautiful children, and challenged by God to raise them. I have always been humbled by the love my kids give me as I don’t feel I deserve it. I yearn for a hug when I get home everyday and it sustains me greatly.

But, my children are on the autism spectrum. When we received the diagnosis for my son, it changed our sense of normalcy and continues to everyday.

I yearn for peace in my lifetime. I yearn for a day where no one dies from a violent act. I yearn for the end of DAPL and police brutality. But for my family, I yearn for normalcy for my son and daughter.

Their future is in even more flux with the new administration in our country. My son receives therapies to help his speech and behaviors that are paid through disability Medicaid. Paul Ryan’s plan to replace the ACA would block grant Medicaid giving the states the ability to cut funding if they need to. Or they could simply go bankrupt like Alabama.

Every parent has a dream for their child well before they are born. When we received my son’s diagnosis I had a period I called grieving a “loss of possibility”. I am not sure if my son will go to prom, play music or sports, or even be able to speak more complex sentences. I believe and pray he will, but I still have days where I yearn for an alternate future for my son.

I yearn for normalcy, and I say #FuckThisShit to everyone who will fight to take my son and daughter's chance to have that.