Where did all my energy go?
God created us with “batteries included.” Scripture says we have everything we need for life and godliness. Children come into the world with energy. Just spend a day with a 3 yr. old. And these batteries God gave us are rechargeble. So why do you find yourself as an adult with little to no energy? Here are 5 reasons to consider.
Let’s just start with perhaps the biggest reason for your lack of energy. More than likely this starts with mom and dad. They may have failed you in a million ways. Perhaps they divorced and abandoned you. As a child, you didn’t understand why they didn’t choose to love you well. Then you move on to a life of broken promises, unmet expectations and loss. You’re angry.
Now perhaps you’ve recognized this. Maybe you’re a Christian who believes you should forgive. You’ve had thoughts of forgiveness. Perhaps even talked it out with a friend, pastor or therapist. You did it once. You forgave. However, if you’re really honest, you’re still angry. Reality is there is more work to be done. Forgiveness is an ongoing process that can last a lifetime. It takes courage to do the work of forgiveness.
If you want more energy, here’s a tip: work through forgiveness.
Ok, Joshua. So you start with unforgiveness and now you move to secrets. These are tough issues. Yep. It took powerful issues to diminish the amazing power God gave you. As a Christian, you could think of secrets as sin. And certainly unconfessed sin can be secrets. But it goes way beyond that. A secret can be anything you want to cover up and hide. This can run the gammit from “I stole a piece of gum” to “I was raped or had an abortion.” I can guarantee you that if you’re having an affair, lying to and deceiving your boss or deal with something shameful alone, your energy will be diminished.
It takes tremendous courage to work on this one. It likely includes coming clean, being vulnerable and paying prices. If you’ve had an affair and come clean, you may have huge prices to pay. But if God gives you and your spouse the grace to walk it out, there can be amazing things at the end of the journey.
Unresolved Relational Breakdowns
This is probably a cousin to unforgiveness because very often unresolved relational breakdowns lead to unforgiveness. The reality is that in a fallen world, relationships break down. Your youth pastor or church leader let you down. Wasn’t there for you. Friendships disappear. Dating relationships are broken up over a text. Your boss fired you or you were fired.
I’m not saying that every relationship should work out. Everyone is a friend forever. You marry the first person you date. No, relationships end. But there is so much unsaid. So many hard conversations never had. Probably many relationships that could have been saved and perhaps made even better. Healthy endings when necessary and if possible.
When you have 20–30 years of relational breakdowns that never get resolved in a healthy way, it’s going to diminish your energy.
Wait, self focus? Isn’t it a good thing to work on yourself? If I’m reading this and considering how to regain my energy, aren’t I focusing on myself? Well, yes. Working on yourself is a good thing. But what I’m saying here is that it’s a slippery slope. Navel gazing can lead to paralysis. Well, I can’t do XYZ till I fix myself. And then you wake up years later still working on yourself.
One thing I know is this: you generate energy when you focus on serving others. Truly loving others. I’m not talking about “people pleasing.” But if you’ve ever served a meal to the homeless, dug a well or built a home in a third world country or helped an immigrant child learn to ready, perhaps you’ve experienced the energy generated by serving others in love.
Lack of Vision
Maybe this last one is obvious. How could you have a vision for your life if you’re bitter, holding secrets, have a history of 100’s of unresolved relational breakdowns and you’re staring at your belly button, I’m quite certain that you’re not going to have vision for your life. So work may need to be done first in these first four areas before you’re even in a space to contemplate vision.
So this may be where the fun starts as you’ve worked through the other areas. Finding your purpose. Your calling. The reason that gets you up in the morning. I’m not sure I have the best tips fro creating a vision. What I do know is that God created you with gifts. He has works prepared for you to do. And as you can work toward clarity about that purpose, you’ll find fresh energy.
This seems hard and deep
Absolutely! I’m going to the heart of the problem. Perhaps some of the roots of your lack of energy. Sure, it would be soooo much easier to just give tips and tricks. Exercise in the morning. Eat clean. Get quality sleep. Blackout curtains, organic beef, burst training, day planners and life coaches are all awesome things. But you can be an angry athlete. Gluten free but emotionally bound up. So we’re talking about emotional batteries that support everything you do.
So now what?
You’re awaking to the fact that you have low or no energy in your life. You’ve had the courage to inquire as to why. One or more of these areas struck a cord with you. In your gut, you’ve gotten honest, raised your hand and said, “Yes, these things are true for me.” But now what. Having a realization is just a start. The knowledge that something is true doesn’t generate much, if any energy. You may have to dig deep down inside and stir yourself to action. It may start with a conversation with a friend, pastor or counselor. Doing the hard work.
One amazing thing about living in our time is that there are tremendous resources. This includes events like the Encounter Training which my wife Amy and I have sponsored for many years. In fact, I’m writing this post as I’m sitting in an Encounter Training (April 2017). Many of these thoughts are flowing from what is happening in the room. There are many, many good works you could engage with and one of those could be the 4 day intensive work called the Encounter Training.
You can find out more at www.encountertraining.com.