Forgiveness feels good.

You get in a heated discussion with a coworker about a particular project. They say things that cut you. You end up saying things you regret, too. You avoid them for an unreasonable amount of time.

You get in a fight with your partner about something insignificant. They’re being angry and irrational. You say things you don’t mean. You feel crummy. Everyone feels broken.

You’ve hurt your friends, family and loved ones in ways you can’t yet fully comprehend. You start to get down on yourself. You think that you’re not worth anyone’s love anymore. You think you’re scum.

In my life, I’ve noticed that the sooner I can let go of my anger and forgive those who have wronged me, I feel as though a hidden but noticeable weight has been lifted. The sooner I can genuinely forgive myself for the times I’ve hurt others, I feel reborn.

What good does bottling up all those feelings of anger and frustration and heartbreak do? Not a damn thing.

It’s important to recognize your failures, and proactively try and change your habits and behaviors. In doing so, you’ll continue to trend upward in a positive direction, allowing yourself for recursive self-improvement.

The most important element within forgiveness is your capacity for empathy–recognizing how you’ve made the other person feel. Understanding and feeling their thoughts and emotions helps keep your relationships in check.

But sometimes the last person standing in your way from becoming a better person is you. Forgiving yourself is also really hard, and forgiving yourself for wronging others is possible, but not without due patience and gentleness from yourself.

I’m striving to be more empathetic towards others. I’m working on forgiving those who’ve wronged me. I’m trying to understand how I’ve hurt others, and forgive myself for my shortcomings. It feels good.

When you look back on life, are you going to be more happy with the time and energy spent holding onto grudges and not forgiving those who’ve wronged you, or the moments you were able to overcome stubbornness, anger and pride, and really love people?