Fifty Shades of Gray Hair: Baby Boomers Still Leading the Sexual Revolution

As young men and women in the 1960s and 1970s, Baby Boomers found themselves in the vanguard of rejecting traditional values, promoting social change, and — of course — sexual experimentation. Now many of them are letting their “freak flags fly” once again by attending swingers’ parties, switching gender roles, and entering the wild world of femdom (female domination).

Many original participants in the Sexual Revolution are currently flocking to join a nationwide organization, ClubFEM®, which promotes female dominance over males. The club’s slogan is “Women Enslaving Men,” and they mean it! The median age of ClubFEM members is around 40, with many males in their 50s, 60s, and 70s.

Submissive men eroticize serving and pleasing a woman, being out of control, and squirming under her thumb. A man’s submissive sexuality (usually recognized in earlier years) is not typically realized and expressed until later in life. It can take many forms: spanking, bondage, cross-dressing, forced feminization, male chastity, age play, or a female-led relationship. And mature women — many of whom have newly discovered their dominance — are often happy to take the lead!

Here’s why Baby Boomer men (and women) increasingly embrace the femdom lifestyle:

Submission is the ultimate cure for a midlife crisis. After decades of shouldering stressful personal and professional responsibilities, many men seek a way to relieve the pressure. Taking a ride in a flashy new sports car may make these guys feel free for an hour, but many find giving up all control to a dominant woman is a much longer-lasting (and more satisfying) solution. It’s not a coincidence ClubFEM’s logo is an abstract bustier and key: A man entrusts his locked chastity device’s key to his chosen domme.

Divorced daddies are now lone wolves… and on the prowl to be dominated! The newly minted sub is often freshly sprung from a long-term marriage to a traditional woman, one who clings to a rigid, conventional sexuality. His mystified former Mrs. seldom has a clue about his true preferences. If she is aware of his desire to be dominated, she may have simply ignored his cues…or forcefully rejected his needs and suggestions as being too outré. After a few decades of unsatisfying marital relations, the submissive Boomer male can declare it’s his turn to realize his true sexuality.

Time is on their side…and they have tons of it. Many Baby Boomer males are retired or preparing to be. This means that they are finally available to do a domme’s bidding, whether that’s cleaning her house or licking her boots. Having abundant free time is a boon for submissives, and retirees have that in spades! Guys who used to be tied up by demanding, inflexible work schedules are finally free to be tied up literally, for as long as their dommes deem appropriate. Retired subs love spending their days helpless at the hands of a dominant woman.

Age is just a number…and some men choose to regress! Now that their kids are all grown up, these fellows are free to be kids again…or even babies! If a guy has spent decades living up to others’ expectations and working to meet major personal and professional obligations, he may find crawling back into the playpen an ideal way to free himself of adult responsibilities. This behavior is known as paraphilic infantilism, commonly called age play. Older adults who seek this kind of nurturing are primarily male, with a roughly 60/40 male-to-female split among adult diaper wearers.

Submissive sex can be safe sex. With age comes wisdom — so it’s no coincidence that many once-experimental Boomers are looking for a way to have new experiences and partners without exposing themselves to STDs. BDSM fits the bill. When engaging in dominance and submission, conventional penetrative sex is not a requisite, only an option. In fact, females rectally penetrating males (often with strap-on devices) is increasingly practiced among adults…and especially with older men.

Femdom is a forbidden fruit. Accepting feminine control is a way for men to stand out and be different — and individuality has always appealed to Boomers. Whether he’s being dominated by a woman or serving her, he may respond to the beat of a different drummer.

Not all Boomer boys were initially eager to share their professional, economic, and political power with women. And this entrenched sexism may lead one to wonder how older guys could ever kneel before a woman and address her as his owner or mistress…while wearing her collar attached to a leash! But now that they’ve had a few decades of gender equality, increasing numbers of older men are finding female-led relationships, and pleasing women in general, quite the turn on.

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