My Headphone Husband

I was sitting on a park bench last week, wearing headphones and reading a book. The book was blank inside and my headphones were playing that sound my TV makes when I turn it on. What’s it called? Static? I’m not sure, I don’t pay much attention to my surroundings. It was a beautiful day. Or maybe it was raining? Doesn’t matter, it’s all the same to me. All I know is that in the outside place, other people walk by me sometimes, and in the inside place (my apartment), they don’t.

Anyway, I was reading the pages of my book and drowning out the world around me when I saw an enormous shadow pass in front of my face (I think that means it was sunny out? What is weather?). I was alarmed, so I looked up. It was a man! A real, live man, the likes of which I had never seen before. For some reason, he was waving his hand up and down in front of my face rapidly. It was confusing, but his smile was so confident and easy-going that I kept looking at him. But what could he possibly want with me? Why had he, a real live man, approached me, a woman on a park bench? It didn’t make any sense.

Luckily, he helped me out by opening his mouth and saying some words. I couldn’t hear them, because of all the static in my ears, but I could tell he was trying to speak to me. Only I couldn’t hear him with those pesky headphones covering my ears. It was so frustrating! What could he be saying? Oh well, no way to find out. I just kept staring.

But then, he did something that made me feel like maybe he could really be the man for me. He put his hands to his ears and acted like he was taking off a pair of headphones. It was like he had headphones on himself, but he didn’t! That confused me at first, but after he slowly mouthed the words “I. Want. To. Talk. To. You. For. A. Minute.,” I figured it out: he wanted me to take off my headphones.

Wow. Not just anyone could convey such a complex message through such simple gestures. But he did. It was amazing.

Once I finally figured out how to get the headphones off, I could hear his decisive, rapid voice. He said, “I know it’s not normal to approach someone with headphones in…” and then I wondered, is that why nobody’s ever talked to me before? He was so brave for talking to me anyway.

After he clarified several times that normally, he would never approach someone wearing headphones but I was a special exception, I walked off toward the sunset with him and now, a week later, we are married. I’m so lucky that despite my headphones, he recognized that I was open to meeting a new boyfriend or lover. Or even, a husband. ❤

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