Breaking News! Larry Harvey of Burning Man to eat 1000 pounds of fecal matter… for art sake!
Sources say Larry Harvey of Burning Man, also known as the self-proclaimed Anti-Christ, Satan, Hitler, and known to all as Cunt, has broken the record for eating the most fecal matter in one sitting ever.
Sources say Larry Harvey, a known repressed homosexual and pedophile, was quoted saying “I am going for the world record! Now I know that there is no actual record for for this yet, but I am a complete idiot and I smell bad and I make super bad decisions so why should I stop now.”
Sources say that fellow followers of Cunt think this is a great idea and have been saving their doodies for the occasion all year. “We are really looking forward to this as Cunt loves shit, as he is always saying ‘I love this shit!’”
Sources say Larry “Cunt” Harvey has been practicing eating shit all year in preparation for this special day! Friends of Larry “Cunt” Harvey say “His breath does smell like shit, and he is usually full of shit, so this should be no problem for him as he always eats plenty of shit and when he shits he eats that too. And you are what you eat. So this is going to be right up his ally.”
Although every single doctor on the earth has told Larry “Cunt” Harvey that this will without a shadow of a doubt kill him Larry has decided that he is going for the record and wants to leave his “skid mark” in the history books as the Cunt that ate the most shit ever, on purpose!
Even though the doctors warning Larry “Cunt” Harvey knows he will be OK as he worships the God Sterquilinus and believe if he eats enough of his God he will become Sterquilinus.
Psychiatrists are very excited about his decision as they believe this may be a new treatment to cure mental illness.
The event is planned for the day after yesterday. Good luck Cunt we wish you the “Best” in your endeavors to set and break the world record!
Originally published at jokey.news on November 21, 2016.