What a 2 Year Old Can Teach You About Sales
Ever heard of terrible twos? It’s a term coined to describe the phase, around 2 years of age, when little kids become unwilling to cooperate, say “no” to whatever you’re asking and generally refute the idea of consensus. Many parents hate that phase, but how about you take this as an opportunity to practice your selling skills? Think about it: multiple occasions to A/B test different tactics with the same prospect, with no risk of losing the lead forever.
As Daniel Pink writes in his book “To Sell is Human” we are all in sales these days, and his Attunement-Buoyancy-Clarity framework definitely works for parents too. However, there is 4 more elements of selling my toddler has brought to my attention:
- Honestly good intentions
- Tailored value proposition
- Offering smart choices
- Compassionate fear
Sell with Honestly Good Intentions
- Here, sweetie, have some soup, you’ll like it.
- No, mama, you go first.
Whether you’re making your kid eat lunch, or sell SAAS plans to grownups, your client wants to make sure you’re truly proposing something good for him. The simplest way to prove your intentions is to demonstrate how the thing is good for you.
My kid’s nanny has had hard time making him eat something she cooked. When she fed him he would only eat sausages or chocolate (already proven to be good and not poisonous). When I asked her to have also a portion herself during the lunchtime, it worked like a charm.
As much as you can’t make a two year old eat something you wouldn’t even try yourself, you can’t force a client to buy from you something you‘re uncertain about. So either you practice being a true believer in your product, and make it show through, or just pick something different to sell.
Tailor the Value Proposition
- Eat the turkey, sweetie. It’s good for you, will make you grow bigger.
- No! Jumping!
(The kid makes his 128th jump from the couch)
- OK, you don’t want to eat the turkey. So don’t. But what if I told you that turkey actually makes your jumps more powerful? Would you like to be able to jump with more power?
- Yes!
Which normal two year old says “no” to more powerful jumps?! Despite being pretty intangible, the value proposition here is so relevant to his current situation, that he would have hard time justifying why he still doesn’t want turkey. And when you remember to reinforce the message (“Wow, look how you are jumping now that you ate the turkey!”), you are earning his trust that you can capitalize in future, not only when there is some turkey to be eaten.
A value proposition that resonates with the client’s current situation is much more likely to influence his purchase decision than a general description of benefits (good for you, makes you bigger). But to be able to come up with such you first need to observe and listen to your client, and learn first hand where they could use some help. You’d be surprised how often businesses base their value proposition on what they assume clients need, instead of what they heard from them.
Another component here is trust. It is quite easy for any generally intelligent person to figure out a relevant value proposition. But unless you want to bamboozle your client into a one-off swindle deal (I hope you don’t!), you also need it to be realistic, deliverable. If you don’t deliver on the promise, you lose your precious trust points, pretty useful when you want to close deals in future.
Offer Smart Choices
- Which toothbrush would you like to brush your teeth with, the pirate or the airplane? And which toothpaste?
Our kid has two toothbrushes: with a pirate and with an airplane. And then there are two toothpastes: with a pirate, and with a mouse. It gives us a total of 4 combinations for how the teeth can be brushed in a parent-approved way.
When it comes to toothbrushing, we basically skip the negotiations of the act itself; instead we negotiate a desired pairing of toothbrushes and toothpastes. Once the toddler manages to convince mommy (who obviously expresses her own opinions too) about his choice of tools, there is no way he’ll say no to the core of the business, namely toothbrushing. After all he has already invested a lot into deciding how it should be done, and has even persuaded mommy that it should be the mouse toothpaste on the airplane brush!
When you present clients with a manageable number of viable and attractive choices, they have to invest some time to learn about what would be best for them. Once they have spent time comparing options, prioritizing needs and making decisions, they will less likely say no to your product or service in general. The art here is to craft an offering of options that:
- doesn’t overwhelm with too many choices (the paradox of choice)
- isn’t to scarce and too easy to decide
- every option is somehow attractive to the client, regardless of his particular business needs
- every option is attractive to your business too!
A good selection of choices should be a little bit like logical puzzle: not too hard, but very rewarding to solve. And whatever the client picks, his choice has to be appreciated.
Wow, look, now that you brushed your teeth they’re so sharp, sharp as dino’s!
Respect the Power of Compassionate Fear
- Oh dear! Did you hear? The ghosts might be coming! We need to pretend we’re sleeping!
I started mentioning ghosts to my kid when he was about 10 months, only in that particular context. When he’s pretending he’s sleeping, it makes him doze off at instant. It’s an extremely powerful trick, works in 100% of cases and thank goodness hasn’t backfired — yet. I treat it as a last resort, when nothing else works and it’s 10pm.
The most interesting part here is that I have never ever said anything about the ghosts: how they look, what they do, where they come from. I’m guessing that even now at the age of 2, he has a very limited understanding of ghosts (he doesn’t watch cartoons).
The mechanism that makes the ghosts such a powerful driver is fear. And it’s not an objectified fear of something terrible, like being kidnapped by ghosts, but just sharing the fear with someone he trusts. It is me, his mother who expresses the fear, and that fear just catches on, making him do whatever I do (here: pretend to sleep). Of course there is some role playing on my side involved, but too many times I have fallen asleep to say that I’ve been just faking it.
Think how easy it must be for a kid to catch serious anxieties from his parents. Motivating with fear and stimulating anxieties have been used as sales techniques for centuries, starting with the biggest religions that are fear-based at their core. Fear is a powerful, hardwired driver of human action and it’s hard to not be tempted to use it in selling.
From a common-moral-sense perspective, if you cause someone to fear something just so that you can benefit from selling them something to reduce that fear, you’re a morally disgusting pig. But what if you truly, honestly fear that too?
Real fear is contagious (ever lived with a person with chronic anxieties?), so if you really, deeply fear something, people around you will catch it. And it will be easier for you to sell them on remedies. But with great power comes great responsibility. Are you ready to deal with consequences of your clients panicking about whatever you have made them fear?
The best part about toddlers is that as they grow up you need to come up with more and more sophisticated techniques to sell them on your ideas. Quite the same in the grownup world, where the generations of customers mature and expect a new, fresh approach with the core values staying the same.
