Exhausted beyond words.
I don’t what was it that made me so tired but I was. I wouldn’t even hang out with my boyfriend for a little while after dinner. I was restless and I just wanted to go home. I couldn’t even reply him because I just that tired, I had no energy left.
My alarm woke me up at 7.03am (I like to set funny alarm times, it just how my body works.) and I snoozed all the way till 7.40am and even so I only got out of bed to shower 10 minutes later.
After shower, I got ready and I was too lazy with make up so I just slabber on a concealer or two. And I felt like I was losing my emotions and feelings and slowly turning into nothingness.
As lame as it sounds, it honestly felt like I’ve been dumped by a sudden realization that my soul has sucked out of my body and all that is left are the thoughts stuck in this human body.
And all I could say to myself was “I’m tired”. The kind of tired where I’m just so tired of everything and I simply, completely, can’t be bothered about anything. Where I just want to isolate myself and not deal with people or things.
I don’t know if it’s just today or the build-up from 4 days ago. I honestly don’t know. How do I end everything with everyone because that’ll be great for me. I just want to be dead for a little while or not have human interaction or any interaction in general.
Work is gonna suck, probably. Also I want to lose weight and be sickly thin. I don’t know. I just want people to be worried for me and saving my sorry ass instead but in the way that I want them to. I get extremely annoyed when they start asking this and that, I mean, glad you’re worried but you need to stop doing that and start doing somehing else.
I’m a nuisance. I rather people not care at all. I’ll feel less obligated to give a fuck and it’ll do me a lot of favour. Whatever.