4 Career Lessons from Game of Thrones’ Olenna Tyrell

[Everything in this post is a spoiler, so if you haven’t caught up to the latest episode, stop reading.]

[I mean it.]

As far as deaths on Game of Thrones go, Lady Olenna of House Tyrell had the quietest, most dignified, and mic drop worthy death of all. No blood, no gore, no fire, just a simple cup of wine and a few sharp words. With her death, House Tyrell (on the show, at least) is officially extinct. Which means, now is the best time to start mining the Tyrells for career insights.

To celebrate one of the cleverest players in Westeros whose death was pointless for anything but shock value (I’m still bitter), here are 4 career lessons we can all learn from the Queen of Thorns.

1. Walking meetings: the perfect time for brainstorming and planning

So why are those walks a great career lesson?

You’ve seen those articles about how sitting is the new smoking. Turns out, all the research and Ted talks are pointing out that that’s true. Sitting is killing both our health and our creativity. Which is why Lady Olenna is starting off this list with the best career lesson for the young and young at heart: walk and talk. It’ll help you live longer and plot better.

The walking meeting is not only a creative boost with unparalleled health benefits, but is also an excellent way to build rapport on a one-on-one basis. Margaery takes a page out of Lady Olenna’s book, by taking Sansa out on a walk-and-talk that ultimately cements them as allies in Sansa’s mind.

Lesson: I’ll still use lunch and coffee for meetings with people I’m not well-connected with, but when it’s a one-on-one planning, brainstorming, or catch up style meeting, I’ll push that we take a walking meeting.

For how to make the most out of the walking meeting, read this.

2. Mentor the younger generations generously.

Behind all of Lady Olenna’s barbs are lessons she’s learned from her long, influential life as the power behind House Tyrell. Every younger woman she meets takes serious note of her scathing remarks, because they know that there’s more than a kernel of truth in what she says. Whether she’s talking to Margaery, Sansa, or even to the Sand Snakes, Lady Olenna is constantly mentoring the young women around her on what she knows best. Surviving, thriving, and biding.

And why shouldn’t young women vying for power listen to her? As the oldest living member of the nobility, and most likely the driving force behind House Tyrell becoming the second most powerful family in Westeros, Lady Olenna is as good a role model as the women of Westeros are going to get. She’s deftly managed situations to her favor at all points of her life, using only her wits and wiles. Case in point.

So, what’s the point? Young women need older female mentors that are occupying positions young women aspire for. They need to know that it can be done, that someone has done it before, and that they don’t have to face as many obstacles as the pioneers did. Or better yet, these young women can ask for counsel from older women on how to do better faster.

Which brings a counter career lesson. Older women who haven’t navigated through similar obstacles aren’t able to advise ambitious younger women, even if they want to be provide insight, which is why some well-meaning career counselors get ignored.

If Lady Olenna had been more of a traditional matriarch, popping out babies and just caring for her family, without paying attention to the political machinations around her, she wouldn’t have a career for us to talk about. But because she’s reached a point where others aspire to be like her, she could teach the younger women lessons learned from her long life of outliving all the clever men around her.

Lesson: Find trailblazers like Lady Olenna, and ask them for advice, especially if you’re a young woman starting out. Even if your older women mentors fire stinging truths (be it about the world you’re entering or at you), don’t get defensive. Instead look for what you can learn from them, and apply it.

When you’ve applied their advice and refined it for present-day, turn around and start mentoring those younger than you. Share your knowledge so that they have an easier time than you did. Don’t be stingy with knowledge.

3. Never reveal all your plans and goals.

While sitting in the gardens, talking about Joffrey’s death, Lady Olenna lets Margaery know that it was she who poisoned the king. Which doesn’t seem surprising until you realize Margaery didn’t suspect a thing until this confession. In a relationship as close as theirs, why didn’t Lady Olenna let her granddaughter in on the plan?

First off, telling someone your goals can stop you from achieving them (and in Lady Olenna’s case, have you imprisoned or executed). It’s counter-intuitive to tell someone what you want to achieve since it gives you the same high as telling them what you’ve already achieved. But announcing your achievement before you’ve done any work makes you quit earlier. Silently working towards it means you’re more likely to accomplish it.

Second, telling someone about your audacious plan results in 1 of 2 conclusions. Either a lot of close friends and confidantes transforming into critics and commentators. Or them becoming loving supporters who’ll never say a negative word towards you. If you want to get things done without unwanted input and opinions, you need to keep quiet until you’ve got something to show for all your audacious planning.

Lesson: No more tweets about hitting the gym, no more updates about sticking to your diet, no more unnecessary social media milestones (unless you’re using them to find new partners and collaborators). No talking about writing a book, no announcing that you’re planning to found a startup, no interjecting opinions on something you haven’t done yet.

Personally, I used to tweet a lot about wanting to go to the gym but I never did. When I did start going, I never broadcasted it or even tell my friends because I’m waiting until I (and subsequently, they) can see the difference. I also stopped announcing that “I’m going to write this thing” and instead, actually started writing the thing. Like this article.

We need to stop seeking approval for announcing goals. Take it instead, when you’ve achieved them.

Bonus lesson: When you do reveal what you’ve been working on, do it as lightly as possible to deliver maximum impact. Don’t ask for praise or comments, just state the facts. Give your audience time to wrap their heads around it as your words sink in. If you’re dropping a bombshell, it’ll do its job.

4. Feel free to ignore advice you think can’t apply to you.

There’ll always be well-meaning people who make it their business to tell you how to run your business.

A friend who tells you not to invest in a certain stock because they heard it’s a bad idea from a friend of a friend, but your friend doesn’t even know how stocks work.

An aunt who tells you to stick to your day job because she thinks nobody will believe in your edtech idea, even though she has no expertise in either education or technology.

And when you’re a woman, it gets even worse because there’ll always be men who mansplain everything. Even if the man is an absolute novice and the woman is an expert.

The solution? Lady Olenna said it best.

We’d all like to be as sharp as the Queen of Thorns, but unfortunately not all of us are afforded the same privilege as she had. So, let’s learn from her shadiest moments and be gracious when facing the noise. Learn to let it not hurt you. And when you get sick of it all, let it rip in a way that’ll make her proud.

Discern what you want to do, who you want to listen to, what kind of comments are helpful to your journey, and stick to that list. If you listen to every single comment thrown your way, you’ll feel like a leaf in a typhoon. Nothing good will come out of it and you’re more likely to get hurt.

And don’t let old traditions, rules, and regulations get in your way. Make your life your own, because you’re the one who must reflect on it when you’re shriveled and old. Your naysayers and critics aren’t going to remember you following their comments; they’ll be too busy thinking about their own problems and regrets on their deathbeds.

Lesson: I am a small, Asian girl living in the Philippines. Whenever I post something, there will invariably be a comment from some white Westerner pointing out how I was wrong because they lived out a different reality from what I wrote.

That used to sting, because who wants to be told they’re wrong? But now, I let it go. Someone pointed out that for someone to comment that means they don’t know where the Philippines is, or what it’s like to think of perspectives outside their own. I wish them luck. It must be wonderful to be the dominant perspective, but I will never know what that feels like which is why I keep writing on my blog. To share a perspective outside that which we accept as ~fact~.

So, I’ll need to let all my feelings on this topic go. I can’t solve it, so I’m going to stop thinking about it. But maybe I’ll channel some of Lady Olenna’s shade to the next thoughtless commenter.

Related: 5 Productivity Hacks for Funemployed Fresh Grads

That’s it for my career insights from Lady Olenna Tyrell for this episode of #PopCultureCareerParallels (what a terrible name, if you can think of a better one, please do tell me, I suck at naming things). I miss the Queen of Thorns’ sass every week, and the only comfort I have is that she and Margaery are finally together again.

What do you think are career lessons I missed? Or was completely wrong about? I’d love to know in either the comments below or an email to justine@thebordercollective.com.

And who do you think I should write about next? I’d prefer someone already dead so that the show won’t add more material about the character. Would love to hear your suggestions in the comments or in a private message.

All in all, thanks for reading!

My name’s Justine Chua, a delayed senior in the top private university of the Philippines because I interned every summer for multinationals, and every semester for startups. I write a blog about interning, resumes, and what college kids from the top tier universities need to know about careers called The Border Collective.

This semester, I’m currently working on building an online course about how to build a top tier resume in <1 hour, and if you want to be kept up to date on that, please sign up here.

And if you’re up to it, say hi on Twitter~