Your Goals are Bullshit

Let me explain.

When I was 19 years old, I desperately wanted to weigh 200lbs. I am 6’4 and in high school, never cracked 170lbs. It’s weird because looking back, I knew some of my shorter friends envied me for my height. At that point in my life, I would have given a couple of inches for some muscle (which they had plenty of btw). When I got to my freshman year of college, I decided I would do whatever it took to weigh 200lbs. I got the biggest meal plan, used my roommate’s extras, and ate off campus every chance I got. I lifted heavy weights 7 days a week and never did cardio. By that spring, I weighed a proud 200lbs exactly. I worked my ass off and hit my goal.

I also looked terrible, got winded walking up stairs, and generally felt like shit. Walking to class was painful. Suddenly, I had a new goal. I would hit 12% bodyfat and have a six pack. Next fall, I weighed 180lbs and had a six pack. But I was hungry and grumpy all the time and I looked like a weakling again. Time to gain again.

Do you see how this is a continual cycle of feeling like shit? It’s not just working out, you can apply this to what you’re doing in your career, your love life, you name it. The problem with goals isn’t the result, it’s the next goal. It’s a series of exhausting uphill climbs with no breaks. I mean, who wants to feel like shit all the time?

Back to my story. I started reading everything I could. I experimented with fasting, carb cycling, my macronutrient intake percentages, protein dessert recipes, you name it. And I started to like it. I don’t have set long term goals. I want to be as fit, healthy, and muscular as I can be. I currently weigh 242lbs. I work out 4–5 times/week because I want to. I know I look pretty good for 29 because my wife says so, so I’m good with where I am. But I’ll get better by default because I enjoy it. As I continue to learn how my body reacts to different food and exercise, I’ll get better. Slowly, but I’m ok with that now because I enjoy it.

Did you notice the mindset shift? Instead of making myself feel like shit to achieve a goal, I learned to love it. I educated myself, I looked at my body as a result of food and exercise instead of a goal, then made small changes to get results. Guess what? Once these small changes become habits, they start to feel good. Then wanted to make more small changes.

Think about how you could apply this shift in your life. Instead of saying “I want to make $100,000”, or “I want to weigh 120lbs”, become interested in the journey. If you want to make $100,000 in sales, invest in yourself. I’ve met very few people who make six figures in sales who don’t read at least 10 books a year, go to at least one conference in their industry, or have a personal coach. These rich fuckers ENJOY THE GRIND. And those super ripped guys and gals at the gym? You know, the one you want to look like? I can guarantee you 99% of them actually enjoy working out. They enjoy the pain they’re put through at the gym, just like good salespeople enjoy improving themselves.

It’s not going to happen overnight. Nothing important does. You make it happen by finding a way to enjoy the ride.