Don’t live a life wasted.

A simple combination of five words — meaningless on their own — strung together to create a seemingly simple and motivating message for the reader or listener. Five little words. That’s all. Except, that’s not all.

Not a lot gets me through the day, but usually what does help me push through are the little things; waking up to my morning alarm just to roll over into the arms of someone who loves me, and pulling my feet out from underneath the furry friend at the foot of my bed; the way strangers genuinely wish me to have a good day; singing my heart out alone in my car, to and from work everyday. For a long time, I paid no attention to those little things. Minor details seamlessly fell to the wayside because I felt compelled to worry about “bigger things”.

Thankfully — before it was too late — I realized that those minor details are what make a life. You can’t make a life without those passing glances and temporary moments. Just like a song needs bridges and hooks and a novel needs adjectives and seemingly pointless descriptions. Unfortunately, not many people begin to really notice the world around them until it’s too late. I truly believe that there is too much beauty and realness in this world, too much to think and feel to want to give up on it all. In my opinion, I feel that most people who feel they have no way out — rather, only one way out — have not been given the opportunity to experience those thoughts and feelings of realness and beauty. And I can’t help but wonder how someone’s perspective might be changed with some much-needed exposure to the world around them.

Of course I can’t preach this as fact. I don’t know the struggles that others endure, and I can’t truly experience how another person perceives everything around them. But I can choose how I perceive the things around me. And I know completely of the struggles that encompass my daily life. And even on days that I feel consumed by them, I cling to the fact that there is more out there for me. My story isn’t finished until I say so.

I used to fear death. Not anymore. But you know what I do genuinely fear? I fear life. I fear the hypocrisy that life brings. The fact that the days progress so slowly, but yet life is so incredibly short. The fact that we are told to go after what we love and dream of, but yet also commanded that we should settle for some security and ultimate peace of mind. The fact that if you work hard you can achieve anything, but yet can also amount to nothing.

But I do not fear dying. I will embrace my experiences when it is my time to go, for I know that I will have lived a life not wasted.

I’m not the type of person to “live each day like I’m dying”. I feel like unless you are given a predetermined amount of time left in this world, that whole mindset is kind of useless. Obviously you can’t live life to the fullest everyday — it’s rare when a day comes along that I feel like a whole person, honestly. Some days, all a human being really needs is comfort, and I don’t see anything wrong with just wanting to relax at home and pretend — at least for a little while — that responsibility, stress, and reality don’t exist. So, I don’t try to live each day like it’s the last. But I do try to simply just live. I’ve learned that everyday you survive is an accomplishment in itself. I think it’s bullshit that someone should be expected to do something amazing and unforgettable every single day. In my day to day life, I try to at least do something that I want to do. Something that I can dictate and do at my leisure, even if it’s just watching a favorite TV show or playing some music that I enjoy. I also try to do at least one thing everyday that scares me, or at least constitutes taking a risk. That doesn’t necessarily mean that I conquer my fears everyday, it could be something as small as mustering up the courage to call the pizza guy or introducing myself to new people.

At this point now, I’d like to wrap this up. I was prompted to create this blog and to write what you just read because of a video I watched earlier titled “I Jumped Off The Golden Gate Bridge”. A survivor details his experience after leaping to the water below from 20-plus stories high — and living through it. He was trying to kill himself. He is among thousands who have also attempted, but only shares the same fate as 19 of those thousands. He said that after he leapt from the bridge — one millisecond after — there was instant regret. And all other survivors said the exact same thing. It really puts life into perspective, I think.

Thanks for reading.