Those Wishy Washy Parents, I tell you.

I’m going to give you a little background on my story today, with how my parents raised me, first.

My parents have never been the type to be strict. Growing up, they were not those stereotypical “Asian parents” that were portrayed in movies, tv shows, and like other asian families we knew. When I always noticed that, I always felt so grateful. “Cool, I’m so glad my parents aren’t like THAT”, would always pop into my head whenever I rolled my eyes at something I witnessed.

However, with the, I’ve always struggled with my freedom and my space. My parents love me and support me, I know that. But sometimes, a little too much love and smothering can be too much. They never really let me spend the night at a friend’s house; it rarely ever happened. I never hung out with friends and went out with them, or go on “play dates” when I was in elementary school. It took me a while to convince them to let me go to shows with my friends, even when I had my own car. Their main concern is my well-being and I appreciate that, I really do, but sometimes it’s just too much.

Something I also have to point out, my parents have always financially supported me and I think this is something that really is affecting what I am trying to do for myself right now. They never pushed me to get a job in high school as soon as I could, they didn’t push it onto me when I was in college, and after, they suggested but never pressured. They just always told me to focus on school, so I did.

With this, they never really pushed me to be independent and learn those real-life aspects on my own. I’ve always been dependent on them for everything. 2015 was the first time I did my taxes and filed it INDEPENDENTLY! Yes, that was huge for me. It felt great, I tell you.

Now, in 2016, things happened, it’s been a roller coaster, but ultimately it’s been a huge year of soul searching for me and I am so glad that I have finally found what I truly want to do in my life. My parents have always told me, “get a degree, move home, be closer to us, find a job.” I’m still living under their wing. It’s been three years since I’ve graduated from college and I finally am taking steps to move out and start the next chapter of my life.

My parents are very supportive of my move to Oregon. Or so I thought. My mom always told me to go where work is. Well, the last three years I’ve been out of school and am itching to go back. I always knew I was going to go back; however, I just always thought I was going to go back for my Doctorate in Physical Therapy. Not the case anymore. I finally found my true passion: art and design (specifically, lettering). I want to take the next steps to pursue my craft, so I am going to attend Pacific Northwest College of Arts and start myself off with their certification program since I got my degree in Kinesiology and have NO art background whatsoever.

I am taking the necessary steps for myself to get myself going. Looking for a place, looking for jobs, applying for student loans and financial aid, and whatever else I need to get done to get me up there. It made me excited to do these things on my own because I was like, “Wow, I am finally doing this for myself and I can’t wait to show the world that I CAN do it and make it on my own.” Well, my parents still think I should stay home. This is where I’m absolutely stumped. I’ve had talks with them about my plans, my move, and have explained why, yet, they still flip their opinions and tell me to stay here in California close to them.

How the Hell do I get myself out of this situation?

Lost and confused,

xoxo.