The importance of investing in yourself and the things you can control.

Kai Suen
3 min readMar 30, 2015

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I was recently watched this interview where an mixed martial artist discusses jealousy in his sport because of how fast he got into the spotlight and how much attention he got. I quote

“Bitterness and jealousy will hold you back. We are all human. At certain times we feel these emotions but you must overcome them and you must think….if anything rather than feeling bitter or jealous take inspiration from it, take that you can do it too or that if I put my head down or if I do this and go from there with a belief in your own ability. Focus on your own ability rather than putting your energy, a negative energy into something, someone that you can not control”

He has a point right? As human beings we often forget about ourselves. Spending countless hours on something or someone trying to control something we can’t. We put hours into the uncontrollable, We let it be the priority of our life letting it just eat away at our energy &our minds. Becoming so emotionally invested in it that it leads us to be “controlled” as a result.

We forget to think about “me”. It is not selfish to think about yourself. At times we need to be selfish. We need to be able to put our foot down and say “no” and not just constantly coast along with what everyone else is doing or what they want to do, or what they think is best for you. You have your opinions too.

It’s perfectly fine to say no to people when it comes to yourself & your priorities. For example, If someone is trying to talk to you when your too tired and your want some time alone after a long day tell them “ it’s been a long day. We talk about it later when I get some rest”.

There is no point in investing your time into something or someone when you are not in the right mind frame for it so take your time until you are. It be more constructive and it won’t drain you.

Do what you have to do first instead of what other people want you to do. If you got a competition coming up or something else and you want some time to yourself to prepare/get ready in whatever sense that may mean to you then fricken take it.

Be honest with yourself and others around you. Express your views and your opinions. Don’t always take the backseat. Have the courage to put yourself first and work on your own goals. Others will appreciate your honesty and if they don’t then forget about them. If they don’t appreciate it then why waste your energy when you can put it into your abilities/goals or whatever it may be. I’ve always believed in and lived by a personal motto that goes like :

“if you focus on yourself, everything else will fall in place”

Whys that? Because if you focus on yourself then the people who want to be a part of your life will try be a part of it and the ones who don’t won’t. That’s just my advice tho. You don’t have to take it.

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