A Night at the Theater — a tale of family and work
It had been a long day in an even longer spring. The room is empty except for me and the external IT-consultant. We are small talking and I tell him that I am going to see a play about the balance between work and family. The format of the play was experimental theater.
He immediately asked: “Are you having trouble with balancing your work and your family?” I didn’t answer him, because saying “No” would be a lie and the alternative was even worse. I didn’t dare admit that I have trouble with the balance in my life. So I just told him that I was curious.
It was a strange question from him, because he works at our company for 30 hours a week and he has many other customers. He works about 50 hours a week excluding transport. H has an one drive to our company from his house. So maybe it was a small cry for help or an invitation to talk more personally with him about his thought regarding the issue.
I am afraid to talk about these things, because showing weakness might crack my skin and show the world my mangled form. In other words I am afraid to show me true self for fear of the opinions of others.
I think my others have the same issues regarding the balance between work and family. Both the fear to talk about it and the actual balance.
Even after a long day at work I decided to go the play at my labour union instead of going home to my family. The truth is I flee into my work and my volunteer work at the union to get away from my family as much a possible. Probably because I don’t like the person I am when I am with my family. But the alternative is even worse. Telling my wife how I really feel about the raising of our children and our life together might be liberating, but it would also be the ultimate loss of control of the situation. And I fear the uncertainty the most, I tell myself or maybe her reaction. The end result could be a life alone.
With all these ambiguous feelings I went to watch a play. And was rewarded with pleasant evening with good colleagues, good food and challenging actors. The play made me look at my life, not in an intrusive way, but with wits, humour and great deal of gravity. The focus of the play was how do we organise ourselves in regards to our family, colleagues and employers.
It’s funny what gets us think and talking. Everyday we just lower our heads and do what we think is required. So for us to reflect on things we need a kick in the head. Which this was.
Hopefully this will be a kick in the head for some. The solutions isn’t always within our reach but acknowledging the problem is the first step.
