“Tell me and I forget, teach me and I may remember, involve me and I learn.” — Benjamin Franklin
I didn’t set out to become a relationship coach.
But every therapist quickly learns it’s an essential part of the job because relationships are such big players in our lives.
We learn that good relationships are the source of so much happiness and, when they go wrong, so much pain.
And that helping people understand and improve their intimate relationships is often best way to help them improve their lives.
We each have our own relationship “journey” and that means learning some things the hard way, down in the trenches. But, if you’re up for a shortcut, here are some things to ponder. …
“It is what it is. But it will be what you make it.” — Pat Summitt
Are you mentally strong?
The bulletproof few will be nodding their heads. But most of us have times when we wobble under pressure. When we feel more paper than rock.
That’s okay. If we want to go anywhere, do anything, with our lives — if we want to take risks — we’re going to feel the heat. Sometimes to boiling point.
And, even if we’re content with where we’re at, there’s no escaping the ordinary stress of 21st Century life.
The trick is to build your mental game. Not in the way Navy SEALs do it. You don’t have to spend weekends crawling through mud or scaling mountains with packs on. …
“The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are.” –Carl Jung
Who are you?
Can you put hand on heart and answer that question fully and truthfully? Or are you still trying to figure it out?
Everyone wants to know themselves better, to Make Sense of Themselves. It’s the key reason people come to therapy.
Often they’ll have a specific problem. But, beyond that, they’ll want to dig down into how they roll in the world: their thoughts, moods, emotions, behaviours, fears, hopes and dreams.
Getting to know yourself is a work in progress — for life. No-one ever gets to shut their personal file and say: “that’s it, job done, I know everything there is to know.” …